America's Addiction Coach
David founded 5 Steps to Addiction Freedom in 2005, and set out on a quest to deliver real addiction information that people can put right to work….. to make a difference! He is also known for being compassionate and understanding, and he works tirelessly for clients to help them find inner happiness and beat addiction!
Or I may be reached at vquest_coach@yahoo.com or by phone at 724-203-4575 Pittsburgh,PA (usa)
Alcohol addiction is a term with multiple and sometimes conflicting definitions. While the ingestion of alcohol is necessary to develop alcoholism, the use of alcohol does not necessarily result in addiction. The quantity, frequency and regularity of alcohol consumption combined with the ramifications of financial loss, family disruption, loss of employment and health problems all contribute to the definition.
Contrary to what you may have heard alcohol addiction is not an incurable brain disease. In fact, it is not a disease at all! But, for decades people have believed that alcohol addiction is a disease. Most psychologists, counselors and specialists today still believe that alcohol addiction is an incurable disease that must be "managed" for a lifetime, and that "there is no cure"
However, it's not a genetically predisposed disease that is handed down through faulty genes.
The current biopsychosocial disease model of alcoholism is as follow:
The biological theory - Suggests that habitual users of drugs or alcohol have a biological abnormality that causes them to become addicted. The theory suggests that certain individuals are genetically predisposed to addiction by a faulty gene or perhaps a chemical imbalance in the brain, which renders addiction an incurable disease!
The psychological theory - Views drug or alcohol addiction as problematic behavior. In other words the individual uses alcohol or drugs to enjoy the effects that these substances have on the mind and body.
The sociological theory - Suggests that societies which produce higher levels of inner tensions such as guilt, stress, suppressed aggression and conflict have higher rates of addiction. Furthermore, the model suggests that societies that are permissive of and encourage such behavior have higher rates of addiction.
You see, millions of people in the United States have parents who were addicted to alcohol, while they are not addicted to substances of any kind, and never have been.
In my opinion, the sociological aspect determines what type of addiction someone chooses, largely due to nothing more than exposure. Therefore, it is important to make a lifestyle change. This may include adopting a new circle of friends and activities that are not conducive to drinking!
Now, of course these are common sense philosophies, and while they all can be helpful, none of them will mean a darn thing if you don't get to the root of what is causing your emotional distress!
It is also no big secret that people enjoy the effects of alcohol! But, why can some enjoy it occasionally while others need it daily? The stark difference here is that the occasional drinker is using it just for that; enjoying the experience while the habitual drinker is using it deaden the pain of their emotional trauma. In many ways, this is a solution for people addicted to alcohol! It gets rid of the need to see the truth and deal with their emotional pain. But, I assure you there is a better way to deal with the emotional pain. One that you can work through in the privacy of your home!
You know, some people think that to overcome alcoholism it's just a matter of having the will to stop drinking, but it is not a matter of willpower at all. For many people, suffering from this addiction it is a temporary solution for deadening the pain of underlying emotional issues. Therefore, most do not crave alcohol because of a chemical dependency, but rather because of the happiness it brings them in removing their emotional pain.
Addiction is not a disease because it is actually a symptom that arises due to the need to deaden the pain of underlying emotional trauma caused by family dysfunction.
Once this emotional pain and trauma is removed and self-esteem is restored, the symptoms disappear, and alcohol will become repulsive to you.
The following is a brief outline of the 5 steps to addiction freedom. Prior to following these steps or any addiction recovery program, take the necessary time to ascertain whether you require the additional support of an addiction counselor or medical attention regrading withdrawal.
1. Step One: Unearth the Square Root
Family dysfunction is the common denominator, or square root of all addictive behavior, and until it is brought to the forefront and confronted nothing will change! This is by far the most important and critical step of the entire process. There are two parts to step one, and they are as follows:
A. Uncovering your family dysfunction
Physical abuse
Sexual abuse
Verbal abuse
Alcoholic parent
Controlling parent
Inadequate parenting
B. Confront the parent or parents responsible for the dysfunction
The thought of confronting the person that is responsible for your emotional trauma is one the most frightening situations you will face. However, it is also the most liberating and empowering thing you'll ever do! Why do you need to confront your parent or parents? Well, first let me clarify the meaning of the word confront and in what context we are using this term. Confronting the person does not at all mean that you should verbally attack them for your misfortunes. On the contrary, you are not doing this for them. You are doing it for you! The confrontation is not meant to be an attack, but it is rather a chance for you to set the record straight and drop the emotional baggage that you've been toting around.
2. Step Two: Remove your Emotional Baggage
You have completed step one and have confronted your parent or parents. This in and of itself will have removed much of the pain and emotional trauma. However, to fully free yourself from their emotional stronghold, it will be necessary to find forgiveness in your heart for a family member that has committed an atrocity against you. Forgive! How can I forgive someone that committed these atrocities against me? Many people have a misconception about forgiveness. Forgiveness is not reconciliation! There is a drastic difference between the two. Reconciliation would mean that you have accepted and submit to their behavior and have agreed to try and continue the relationship under those circumstances. Forgiveness means that you merely give up or cease the resentment of the offender.
3. Step Three: Cure Wounditis
Without question, partaking in habitual behavior not only causes you pain but, it inflicts pain on the people around you as well. However, do not allow what you have done in the past or what others have done to you, to cause you to live in fear of what the future holds. The past is the past, it is over, and living in it does not serve anyone well. Live in the present moment, be kind to yourself, and learn to love yourself. How can you love someone else if you don't love yourself? The answer is you can't!!! It isn't a big secret that you're feeling shame and guilt for what you've done. In fact, you're probably questioning right now as to whether you should be punished for your past actions. Well guess what, its ok! God doesn't punish people, we punish ourselves. God is a loving and forgiving being. So if you thought that you would continue to punish yourself with shame and guilt before God gets a hold of you, you can stop right now! We do not have defects of character, are not full of shortcomings, and we certainly are not powerless! On the Contrary, we are all the same, we are all connected, and we all have the same power to change!
4. Step Four: Awaken the Power within
Whether you want to admit it or not, all of the pain you have been through concerning your habitual behavior is a spiritual lesson. And until you view it as such, it will continue to cause you suffering and unhappiness. Every dark cloud does have a silver lining, and if you look hard enough you'll find one in this habitual situation too. However, to find that silver lining you must ask the right questions;
1. What can I learn from my addiction?
2. How can I grow from it?
The answers to these questions can be found in a place that is uncharted by most, and it is just waiting to be explored! It's called your true self! To embark on a journey of Self -reflection requires the practice of Mediation.
For more information on mediation you can visit my website below.
5. Step five: Practice Acts of Random Kindness
Happiness is a state of mind. Individuals that are suffering from addictive behavior are not happy! Ironically, in an attempt to find happiness, they chose a vehicle to mask their emotional pain through the use of alcohol, illicit drugs, and various other compulsions. However, happiness is never found on the outside in material possessions or in the abuse of substances and compulsions! True life happiness can only be found in one place, and that place is within! Happiness is not found in the practice of outward ideals or in other people. To the contrary, it is actually the small acts of random kindness that opens the heart and fuels the principle of unconditional love!
To practice spirituality is to be of service to your fellow man and make no mistake about it that is why we are all here. Begin with small acts of kindness such as opening a door for someone, letting someone go before you in the checkout line or just taking the time to offer a kind word to an older person or a child. You get the picture! The first thing I do upon waking in the morning is think of how I can be of service, and throughout the day I am always mindful of opportunities that present themselves for me to do just that. You know, the paradox of the whole thing is that the more kind and generous you are the more love, kindness and abundance you'll receive back. Don't believe me! Just try it and watch what begins to happen to you.
Finally, good luck in your quest for addiction freedom. Visit my website below to subscribe to my Free E-guide ;
Best wishes,
David Roppo
Addiction Coach
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