Many times external influences affect us tremendously. Take an example- Suppose you had disturbed childhood with a mother who made you feel real fear. Now what happens when you meet somebody who looks like your mother?
The child in you reacts with a feeling of fear, which, from childhood, you have learned not to reveal, so, no one will notice your inner reaction; but you know it's there. At the same time, the adult in you is sure that this is a different person who you need not fear. But this causes lot of disturbance in your mind. The past memories and the present awareness are in conflict. The child who feared mother is in conflict with your adult who says that child need not fear. Burt this meeting brings in childhood memories that are very bad and upsets your balance of mind and peace.
All of us a inner child, an adult and a parent in us. If our adult is in control, it looks at everything logically, but if our parent or child is in control we are guided more by emotions.
Most of us have trouble in handling over our inner child to our adult self. The child does not want to leave control. Our inner child comes in full picture when we are observing something beautiful or sad.
When we allow our adult to control the body, we become logical in thinking. We do not run away from a rope thinking that it is a snake, but we try to find out if it is a rope or snake. Adult does not react to emotions. Adult makes judgment, which is logical.
Our inner parent behaves like our own parents. If your think carefully you will find that you behave like your parents many times. This is because your adult is in control. This parent needs to be replaced by adult. When we react to anything external we should find out who is reacting. Whether it is child, parent or adult. If adult is in control he/she can handle the situation in logical and mature manner.
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