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Key to a Good Marriage? Share Chores With Wife

THE PERCENTAGE of Americans who consider children "very important" to a successful marriage has dropped sharply since 1990, and more now cite the sharing of household chores as pivotal, according to a sweeping new survey.

The Pew Research Center survey on marriage and parenting found that children had fallen to eighth out of nine on a list of factors that people associate with successful marriages - well behind "sharing household chores," "good housing," "adequate income," a "happy sexual relationship" and "faithfulness."

In a 1990 World Values Survey, children ranked third in importance among the same items, with 65 per cent saying children were very important to a good marriage. Just 41 percent said so in the new Pew survey. Choresharing was cited as very important by 62 per cent of respondents, up from 47 per cent in 1990.

The survey also found that, by a margin of nearly 3-to-1, for Americans the main purpose of marriage is the "mutual happiness and fulfillment" of adults rather than the "bearing and raising of children."

The survey's findings buttress concerns expressed by numerous scholars and family-policy experts, among them Barbara Dafoe Whitehead of Rutgers University's National Marriage Project.

"The popular culture is increasingly oriented to fulfilling the X-rated fantasies and desires of adults," she wrote in a recent report. "Child-rearing values sacrifice, stability, dependability, maturity - seem stale and musty by comparison."

Virginia Rutter, of the Framingham State College said the shifting views may be linked in part to America's relative lack of family-friendly workplace policies such as paid leave and subsidised child care.

"If we value families, we need to change the circumstances they live in," she said, citing the challenges faced by young, two-earner couples as they ponder having children.

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