Cyril Malka

One thing is to be able to say no in an assertive and non aggressive way. However, even though you have learned that, you can expect contradictions. Of course, it would be better if other respected your "no", and you are in your right to say no to anything you don't want to do. But, most of the time, people will try to change your "no" into a "yes" by using very specific methods. Happily, there are different ways to overcome them.

There is a Danish song going: "Your mouth says no, no, but your eyes say yes, yes". Very often, even though you do your best to speak in an assertive way, other things, like your eyes or your voice, will betray you. Let's take a closer look.

It is impressive to see how difficult it is to say such a little thing as "no". Many people just can't say no, and they might end up blaming others for that. Of all people, women have even more difficulties than men, since they never, ever learnt how to say no. And if they do, they are very often in trouble.

There are many ways to communicate and to make your point. If things go wrong, it is very often because we communicate too aggressively or too submissively. Aggression, submission, assertion... What does all that mean?

Many of us believe that exaggeration helps people understanding. In fact, we end up at the opposite. Our vocabulary gets poorer. We are less precise in our description and when we use the correct word, it has lost its meaning. See the word "depression" for example, very often, it will be used to define sadness.

A lucid dream is a dream in which you are aware that you are dreaming. These dreams can even be controlled. Do they exist or is it something you imagine? Can it be trained?

Having humor is a strength and many things become bitter if you take life too seriously. However, even though it is a good idea to take some situations lightly, it is not a good idea to laugh at everything. By doing that, you may very well end up tiring others as well as yourself.

Originally, there were only three levels of trance: light, middle and deep. These three levels weren't precise enough so the levels have been redefined to give possibility to accomplish different kinds of work: Therapy, dental work, birth, operations and many other things. In this text, we will see one way to differentiate the different levels.

Is the hypnosis used in psychotherapy the same kind as the one used on stage? Will I let my patients float into the thin air? Will I make them go around and bark? Some of my patients, who didn't know hypnosis asked me these questions. These are very sensible questions regarding the fact that many people only know hypnosis from what they have seen on TV or in movies.

Smokers are very often people moving in waves. At every end of December, start of January, I get new waves of smokers who want to become ex-smokers and who have heard something about "hypnosis being really effective to stop smoking". But, is it true?