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Don G. Asmus - ArticlesDon G. Asmus is a retired healthcare professional and amateur lint collector, who has been writing funny top ten lists ever since he learned how to use a crayon.
Born and raised in Uzbekistan, he was a yak herder and corrupt census official until the age of nine, when he became involved in a sordid sex-for-yak-drippings scandal. Soon afterward, Asmus and the two-legged members of his family were forced to flee to the United States. Penniless and uneducated when he arrived in this country, he parlayed his inability to speak English and paralyzing fear of blood into a highly successful career as a prison dermatologist and unlicensed midwife. Relentlessly hunted by the Uzbekistani secret police, Asmus, his wife and inflatable rubber girlfriend remain hidden in an undisclosed location in Delmar, New York (population 3). Asmus only rarely comes out of hiding to work as the List Master at Funniest Top Ten Lists, where he consistently creates the funniest top ten lists on the Internet. http://www.FunniestTopTenlists.com Funny Top Ten Lists - Top 10 Signs the Obama Plan Isn't WorkingWe all know that President Obama is trying to do his very best. Frankly, that's what has everyone so worried, because the country is going to Hell even faster than former Actual President Dick Cheney. Funny Top Ten Lists - Top 10 Signs That You're Getting OldIs your rocker-recliner being circled by buzzards? Do you have an overpowering urge to embroider a doily? Have you recently soiled your bed? These and many other sinister signs of rapidly advancing age will be irreverently revealed in this totally unscientific article. Funny Top Ten Lists - Top 10 Early Warning Signs of Decreasing Sex AppealIn the interests of gender fairness, we made sure that half of these early warning signs of decreasing sex appeal are directed at men; and the other half, at women. If you're a bit confused about your own gender, watch for our next funny top ten list entitled, Top 10 Places You Must Never Touch Yourself. Funny Top Ten Lists - Three Essential Secrets of SuccessAlthough a well-developed sense of humor is obviously required to successfully create funny top ten lists, it's certainly not the only element. In this article, the author reveals three other essential success factors, which do not require you to have any such innate talents. And that's good news, because it means that each one of these factors can be learned, practiced, and improved. Humorous Top Ten Lists - How to Hit the Funny BoneCreating consistently funny top ten lists is actually much more difficult than you might think. However you can make the task considerably easier, by following these four suggestions from an experienced composer of humorous top ten lists. Funny Top Ten Lists - Advice from a List MasterDevising consistently funny top ten lists can be extremely challenging. The author reveals four ways to avoid the common pitfalls that can prevent you from taking your lists to the top.
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