Katie Lersch

I heard from a wife who said: "when I first found out about the affair, my husband claimed to be in love with the other woman. He wasn't sure if he wanted to save our marriage. Today, he's saying that he realizes that there was never really loved involved and that what he has with me is love while what he had with her was not. So I want for my husband to tell her the same thing that he has told me - that he never really loved her.

I heard from a wife who said: "my husband cheated on me with our accountant. I have known this woman for many years and I trusted her. At the same time, I have been married to my husband for half of my adult life. No one knows me better. He says he will prove to me that the good parts of his character are still there. And I still feel some simmering of love, but then I think back to how he betrayed me. How do I know if I still love him?"

I heard from a wife who said: "about three months before my husband and I were married, my ex boyfriend came back into town and looked me up. I only intended to have a few drinks with him for closure. But we ended up sleeping together, partly because we were both intoxicated. But we are happy. We have a good marriage. And this is just going to hurt him. What should I do?"

I heard from a wife who said: "I find out two months ago about my husband had an affair. I almost walked out on him because I was that angry. He promised he would make it up to me, but he hasn't even started that process. I am so disappointed. Why hasn't he done anything to make this up to me?

At this point, I'm reasonably sure they might have had an affair. This was over a decade ago and we've been happily married ever since. Should I confront my husband about something that happened so long ago?" I'll answer these questions in the following article.

heard from a wife who said: "two weeks ago, I saw some things on my husband's computer that lead me to discover that he had been having an affair. When I confronted him, he didn't seem particularly sorry and he said that he'd been very unhappy with our marriage for a long time. He said he went outside of our marriage because it was no longer fulfilling for him. What a lame excuse. If he was so unhappy, why didn't he just divorce me?"

I heard from a wife who said: "my husband had a 3 month affair a couple of months ago. When I found out, I gave him a choice. End it immediately and do whatever I needed to save our marriage or keep it up and lose me. He said that he didn't want to lose our family so he broke it off. However, although I can tell that he's trying to work on our marriage, he doesn't want to have sex with me."

I heard from a wife who said: "I know this is a huge cliché, but my husband had a long term affair with his secretary. Once I found out, she left her job because she told my husband that she couldn't face me. So I am reasonably confident that she is now out of the picture. But although I would like to save my marriage, I'm not sure if this is going to be possible. I have a friend who stayed married after her husband's affair and she is so angry and miserable with him."

I heard from a wife on my blog who said: "my husband had an affair and I found out about it 2 months ago. Since that time, I have been trying to explore what would cause him to do this. When we first started having conversations about this, he would say that he didn't know why he cheated. But lately, he's started to say that my behavior drove him to cheat. More specifically, he is saying that my criticism drove him to seek out other women."

I heard from a wife on my surviving the affair blog who said: "I caught my husband cheating about a month ago. He didn't have enough integrity to admit to this himself. Instead, I saw text messages on his phone. I am so mad at him. And when I ask him what in the world he was thinking and how he could risk our marriage and our family this way, his response to me is that he wasn't thinking of the consequences before he acted."