I had the best intentions: I planned to breastfeed my son for a year.
Of course, we all know the one about the road to Hell being paved with the aforementioned good intentions.
When I got pregnant and asked my doctor about the breast-vs-bottle controversy, all I heard was this: "breastfeeding is the only way" and "breastfeeding will turn your child into a rocket scientist" and "formula is for lazy mothers who don’t care about their babies".
Wow – that’s not exactly fair, is it? Breastfeeding is a wonderful, natural, beautiful way to nourish and bond with your child. It was my first choice and I wish it had worked out. However, it does not work for everyone. It doesn’t mean you’re lazy or neglectful; there are several reasons why you may need to invest in some Enfamil:
· Some women just don’t get the milk supply (this happened to me, so I can attest)
· Some babies never learn to latch (often a problem for preemies)
· Some women have medical conditions requiring medication that transfers into breastmilk and therefore isn’t safe for baby
· Some women need the convenience of formula based on working/caregiver needs
· Breastfeeding can be VERY stressful; not everyone is equipped to deal with that stress
Whatever the reason you opt for the bottle, it’s important to conquer the guilt that almost always accompanies that decision. Your friends and relatives may have useful input, great advice; but they can’t tell you what’s right for you and your child. Every woman is different, every baby is different, every pregnancy, every delivery – you have to know your own situation and weigh all the pertinent factors before making the choice on how to feed your baby.
I was forced into the bottle for several reasons; my milk dried up due to blood pressure problems, my son was a preemie who never learned to nurse, and the stress of pumping (when my supply was dwindling anyway) was much too stressful for me, considering my problems with high blood pressure. I had to learn the hard way how to get over the guilt, and here are the tips that helped me:
· Today’s formula is perfectly fine; it contains all the nutrients baby needs.
· If you don’t take care of your body, how can you care for your infant?
· You do the best you can: I pumped for as long as my body would allow; therefore my son received five weeks of breastmilk, including the antibodies he needed for his immune system – better than nothing!
· Love and nurturing is the most important thing for your baby.
· Your baby won’t hate you for bottle feeding.
· It’s easier to bottle-feed when traveling or in public.
· You can bond over a bottle by wearing just a bra or camisole, and holding your infant against your skin.
If these sound like excuses to you, then you’ve never been in that situation. However you feed your baby, she cherishes your love more than anything. If you’re able to breastfeed, that is fantastic – I’m glad for you and I envy you! If not, you are no less of a mother: you’re just working with different tools.
For more information:
(1) http://www.womanshealth.gov/breastfeeding/index.cfm?page=227
(2) http://www.preemie-l.org/bfaq.html
(3) http://www.breastfeed.com/articles/overcoming-difficulties/stressed-out-and-dried-up-3259/
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