Cry It Out Defined and Age to Do It
Cry-it-out, as a way to help teach your baby or toddler to fall asleep on their own, can mean something different to just about everyone. Most parents will agree that they do not ever really set out to letting their baby cry-it-out. It is more often the case that a very tired parent will use the cry-it-out method as a last resort.
First, it is a good idea to understand what the cry it out method is not:
- Cry it out is not replacement for feeding when baby cannot comfortably sleep all night without food.
- Cry is out is not meant to be used when baby is hungry, wet, very sick, in pain, etc.
- Cry it out does not mean putting your baby into a room, closing the door and ignoring baby for hours on end.
- Cry it out is not replacement to parenting when baby needs it.
With that mind, here is cry it out further defined:
- Cry it out is a sleep training method to break poor sleep associations.
- Cry it out is setting limits on what you will and won't allow your baby to do (at nap time, all night, etc.).
Sometimes it is just about setting limits that you will not nurse all night or replace a pacifier 10 times per night or rock your baby in the rocking chair for 3 hours and then every 2 hours after that. Those are all sleep associations that sometimes need to be broken (and not replaced with a new one).
The act of crying does nothing to teach baby to sleep and it will not change baby's personality. Cry "it" out is simply letting baby find his own way to fall asleep and allowing him to cry out his frustration about not being able to get that pacifier replaced for the 10th time, for example. None of us get better at something without practice.
Cry It Out – What age?
Parents often ask "What is the right age to allow baby to cry it out?": It is usually recommended to not try a cry it out method to until your baby at least 4 months old. The ideal age is usually before 8-10 months. Once baby can pull to standing, it gets harder (but not impossible) and personalities only get stronger, so it is a good idea to work on healthy sleep habits before that time.
How to Cry It Out
There are numerous variations to the cry it out method and it's important to be responsible about it. It is unfair to just "snap" one day, and let baby cry and then go to him the next day, switching back and forth each day between cry it out and going in to comfort him. Make a plan ahead of time for how to approach using cry it out as a part of sleep coaching and then resolve to be consistent. It is best to not try cry it out if baby is still being swaddled at sleep time as babies need a way to reach their hands to help self soothe. Ensure your baby does not have any health problems by visiting her pediatrician before starting any formal sleep training method such as cry-it-out. If your baby changes sleep patterns abruptly, it can be an ear infection or reflux or another issue, so those should be ruled out. Generally, if your baby has had "sleep problems" for several weeks or months and there have not been health issues, then you may want to consider the cry-it-out method.
Questions and Answers
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