Reasons Why Most Rebound Relationships Don’t Last

Posted: Aug 05, 2009 |Comments: 0 | Views: 3,458 |

Rebound relationship happens to the best of us, whether we want to admit it or not. More often than not, it is a way to fill the emptiness, and the unwanted feelings left by a recent broken relationship. In some cases, however, it’s just a race to see who can find new relationship quicker than their last partner. It’s normal to feel unappreciated and hopelessly unwanted after a break-up of much cherished long relationship – but if the reason for quick rebound relationship is to payback your ex; you may not be worthy of anybody dating you.

Because most rebound relationships are born out of desperation -- there are several reasons to believe that most don’t last. And this is often the case when the reason to jump into a new relationship quickly after a breakup is based on revenge or quick fix for love and attention. Here are few reasons why most rebounds don’t last:

The rebounder, the person who just got out of a relationship wanted to:

• Ease the hurt, feelings and devastation of a breakup

• To show the ex that he/she can find somebody to love anytime

• Use the new person, the “reboundee” to get over the ex

• To release lingering negative energy from the old relationship

• To shield, still fresh and unresolved feelings for the ex

More reasons that rebound relationships don’t work are:

• The rebounder may not care much for the new relationship but wanted it anyway to fill a void

• May spend more time comparing the ex with the new lover who may be unaware that he/she is being used

Who does the rebound relationship hurt more, the rebounder or the “reboundee”?

When a relationship that was once very comforting and loving for someone just ended, it is human nature to wonder what went wrong. What could have I done differently to save the relationship is often one of the unanswered questions that often linger in a person’s mind. But is the person who just rebounded from failed relationship the one that gets hurt most? Overwhelming opinions seem to suggest that the most to get hurt is the “reboundee” – the one who believed that they have found a new loving relationship not knowing that he/she are being played for a fool.

Because most “reboundees” don’t know of their new lovers past, they tend to love openly and freely, and as a consequence they get hurt badly when the rebounder has a change of heart and decide to go back to their ex.

They also do get hurt when the love they are giving freely are not reciprocated equally because the rebounder is still harboring feelings for their ex. Often people in love who have enjoyed long loving relationship find themselves in rebound relationship that they did not envision to find themselves into. At this painful time in their lives it’s very common to feel unappreciated, unwanted, and unloved and the most natural thing to do is date anybody who comes around. Not all rebound relationships are bound to fail – when trust and openness is the cornerstone of any relationship it usually has a better chance of succeeding. Don’t start on a wrong premise; disclose to your new partner what you think he/she must know about you, as early as possible. Be open with your partner so that your relationship may succeed.

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