Dating Professional - What to do When Someone has a Crush on You
We’ve all had crushes on someone; usually back in our school days, but infatuation still happens even when we’re grown up. So, if we’re trying to become dating professionals, how do we handle the situation when someone has a crush on us and we don’t reciprocate that infatuation? Are there dating rules to follow to help you successfully maneuver in this situation in order to cause the least amount of harm to this person or to anyone else?
Even if you don’t feel that someone is a compatible match to you and this person disagrees and thinks that he or she is the perfect match for you, it’s imperative that you maintain the proper decorum and do not succumb to harsh words and criticism. When this person realizes that you do not reciprocate the infatuation, then he or she will be in for enough heartache; you don’t need to add to that by denigrating this person further. You need to take the necessary steps to impart as little emotional scaring as possible to this person. Of course, you are not responsible for this person’s feelings and how he or she reacts to your non-concurrence to the infatuation, but you still need to do your part to inflict as little amount of emotional pain as possible.
If this person has not approached you yet about his or her feelings, but those feelings are still obvious to you, nonetheless, try to ignore any vibes you may be getting and act as platonically normal as you can towards this person. The last thing you want to do, as a dating professional, is to falsely lead this person on into thinking that you have feelings for him or her, when you’re only just trying to be nice. Being nice is good, but don’t allow that to make you lose your focus on the fact that you do not want to encourage your crushes’ infatuation with you.
If this person does make a move to let his or her intentions known, you need to move slowly and remember not to react sharply to this person. Hopefully this person did not declare the infatuation in a public place because you don’t want to publicly embarrass him or her when you express that you do not share the same feelings and you think you both are not a perfect match for each other. You need to play this part by ear because it all depends on how this person approaches you. If the approach is done in public, try to move towards a less crowded part of the room or go outside, so that you allow this moment to be private; yet all the while, making sure to keep your distance so that your crush does not misconstrue your movements as acceptance of his or her feelings for you.
When you break the news to your crush that you don’t have the same feelings, work hard as a dating professional to keep the focus on you and that you are not feeling that you’re right for each other. Be honest, but not in brutality. You want to let your crush know that you think he or she is a nice person, but just not the right one for you. This admission will be painful for your crush to receive; however, it’s best to be honest and let your crush know that he or she does not have a future with you. Don’t get so caught up in the flattery of the infatuation and lead this crush on. When you have the right moment, speak the truth in a loving way.
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