Jim Lim Da Hong, sgtopmarketseller@gmail.com, Freelance SelfEmployed Graduate
How to deal with the silent treatment by getting your ex love partner back for a happy making up relationship?
Your ex has had enough and decided to pack up and leave you behind like yesterday's news. What makes it worse is they're giving you the silent treatment and won't even answer your calls or give you a chance to explain yourself.
One of the things people find hard to cope with is the sudden realization that we no longer hold any control over the person we have become so comfortable with. Suddenly they're the ones calling the shots and you're the one trying to catch up like an idiot.
Truth is once you're dumped... your ex has the power and if they so choose to ignore you and block your phone number, there isn't a whole lot you can do about it... or is there? The best way to handle this sort of situation is to fight fire with fire. You don't deserve to be treated like someone's day old rags. If they're so keen on erasing you from their life, then that's what you'll do too.
Stop calling them, texting them, sending them 3am msn messages. Erase them from your life... but only for now.
Sooner or later, they will start to catch on to what you're doing and then you're the one in control. Problem with this scenario is it doesn't really get you any closer to winning them back. They will think you've joined in on the games and this game playing could go on for months. This isn't what you want. The whole point of ignoring them for now is for them to soften up and approach you again.
Once they reach out to you even in the slightest, it's time to quit the games. It's time to get your act together and do what it takes to get their attention again.
Apologize, explain yourself, tell them you're happy if they're happy... in essence let them know you're on their side and you don't want to continue with the conflicts and drama. Want the fast track to getting your love back? Get that plan together and go get them!
There is this popular joke on silent treatment. A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the cold shoulder. The next week, the man realized that he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence and lose, he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 a.m." The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 a.m. and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 a.m. Wake up."
Many couples have experienced this treatment in their relationships. Even though mature adults know that this behaviour makes one looks childish and manipulative, they still behave this way. Why does it happen? One of the obvious reasons is a show of disapproval, displeasure, or anger. It is also a weapon to get even. Though both genders are guilty of it, it's been said that women are more skilled in this technique. Relationships will suffer if the silent treatment is ignored and when you pretend that it is not happening. This is especially true if it is your normal way of communicating your needs and emotions.
What can you do? Communicate. Talk. Understand each other. Nobody knows what's going on in someone's head. You have to remember that people, even those closest to you and have known you for a long time, can't read your mind. So you shouldn't assume that he knows what you are upset about. Even if he does, he might think that you are overreacting. People see things differently. Something that annoys you may not mean anything to another person.
If you keep feeling annoyed by your partner's behaviour or language, it's better to take a look at your own attitude instead of trying to correct a person. What if you are the one who have set a certain personal standard and you get upset when you think he has violated it? Have you ever sat down to talk things through and discuss about each other's personal rules in the first place? Even if you have been wronged, do you think that the silent technique would correct things? Remember that the more you give the cold shoulder, the further you are going to drift apart. So communicate. Talk about feelings. Build the trust and respect.
What if you are the one who gets the silent treatment? If you have the desire to behave the same way, forget about it. In relationships, it's not about winning or losing. If you open up, you don't lose. Even if he still wants to clam up, you should give it another try, using a different strategy. When everything is back to the way it should be, you can have a heart to heart talk. And if you think that he won't listen, change that perception. It's advisable that you think positive thoughts and imagine better pictures because you create your reality through your thoughts.
The silent treatment may work once, maybe in the early days of a relationship. Don't expect that it will work the second or third time. If you do it too often, you will be ignored. The anger will build up, the issues are not solved and you will feel rejected, even abandoned.
Indeed, life is short. Don't let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again. I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.
How to <a onClick="javascript:pageTracker._trackPageview('/outgoing/article_exit_link');" href="http://www.squidoo.com/how_can_i_retrieve_my_ex_lover_back" target="_blank">win your ex boyfriend back easily</a>?
Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at <a onClick="javascript:pageTracker._trackPageview('/outgoing/article_exit_link');" href="http://www.makingupyourlove.info/" target="_blank">Win Your Ex Boyfriend Back Website</a>.
You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.
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