How to Stop Attracting Mr. Wrong!

Are you at a loss for words and utterly perplexed by the fact that you continue to attract one Mr. Wrong after another? How in lords name does this happen? It’s not as if you’ve placed a classified in the local newspaper, which listed all the descriptive yet detestable qualities you’ve never longed for! And, I don’t think you’ve conducted a Mr. Wrong job fair at the local conference center and laboriously interviewed a cast of undesirable potentials! So, why in the heck do these guys keep showing up? It’s almost as if you’re a Mr. Wrong Magnet! Well, maybe you are in so many words!

Now don’t get me wrong (not a play on words!) I am not at all saying that you deserve to attract the wrong guy. Quite the contrary, you deserve to find the love that you’ve always dreamed of and I’m going to tell you exactly how to get it!

You see, most women attract Mr. Wrong unintentionally or by default! Well, of course it happened by default since you didn’t ask for it! Or, did you?  Well, you may not have verbally asked for it but you did subconsciously! The universe is not partial to what you order, so the celestial waiter will deliver exactly what you asked for, whether you’re aware of it or not!

Attracting Mr. Wrong has everything to do with the energy you are projecting and ultimately the self-limiting beliefs you hold about yourself as well as others. Frequently, this stems from the fears and insecurities which are bred in a dysfunctional upbringing. As a child, were you unloved, verbally abused, controlled, or inadequately parented? How have these things affected your level of self esteem?

Now you may be saying to yourself; what does my self-esteem have to do with attracting Mr. Wrong? Well, everything! If I asked you to describe the perfect partner, what would you say? It’s my experience that most women would describe the perfect partner as being confident, loving, romantic, caring, kind, understanding and passionate. Someone that loves who they are, can easily articulate their needs, pursue there dreams, and is not afraid to love unconditionally. Ok, now describe your qualities! Is that what you are? If not, then how can you expect to attract someone who is? You see, you must become the very thing you wish to attract! So, if you want to attract Mr. Right you have to transform yourself into Ms. Right!

This is profoundly exemplified by Bill Murray in the movie Groundhog Day. If you look closely at the story line there is a deep profound message here, for relationships. Murray plays a jaded weatherman that is forced to relive the same day over and over again. His desperate attempts to change the day fail, and he is forced to step in the proverbial mud puddle of life again and again! It is only when he learns not to manipulate people and lie for his own personal gratification and to act out of compassion, understanding, forgiveness and love that he got a different result. Perhaps, the answer to attracting the kinds of relationships we wish to have in our lives begins within ourselves. We are all here for a purpose, and that purpose is to be of service to others. Having said that, I believe that service starts at home and most importantly with you! Try changing the way you think and the way you view a relationship by offering more understanding, compassion and love unconditionally. When’s the last time you practiced a random act of kindness; holding a door open for someone, helping an elderly person, or paying the toll for the car behind you? You get the idea!

While self-esteem is the key to attracting Mr. Right, it’s not a learned behavior, a commodity that can be purchased, or a fruit that can be plucked from a tree. You see, possessing confidence and merit as a person is a product of self-love, and that comes from within. Therefore, to restore your self-esteem you must first learn to love yourself, and second you must tap into your true personal power by embarking on an inward journey of self-reflection.

This is the place where all your fears and insecurities will melt away, and you’ll become you’re true authentic self; MS. RIGHT!

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The Secret Principles

Best wishes,

David Roppo

Relationship Coach