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Internet Dating Loses Its Stigma

The dating game is never easy at any age, whether you are ten or 50 plus. Up to the age of around eleven or twelve, it is perfectly acceptable and normal to state that a couple are 'going out' together and not actually have to do anything about it other than smile shyly across the classroom at each other. After that age, action needs to be taken, and all right at a time when hormones are ranging and self awareness is horribly magnified.

We are aware of our bodies changing, of the way our voice sounds, of how clumsy we feel and our parents despair at our mood swings that see us disgustingly loved up to the depths of despair when things don't run smoothly.

Somehow or another, we bungle our way through this stage and make it to our late teens and early twenties where our confidence has outwardly grown but our self esteem is a little fragile still. However, at this age we have the loud nightclubs to hide behind and most of our flirting and first dates are bolstered by the noise of a club. Interaction with the opposite sex is mostly visual, this helps to avoid any verbal rejection.

One way or another, we bungle our way through the early years of dating and make it to domesticated marital bliss, or something like that. However, it is only the minority of marriages that will see you contentedly shuffling into old age. A good proportion of marriages will unfortunately end in divorce and many other marriages will be tragically split by the death of one partner or the other. So, where does this leave us?

This means that we get to the age of 50 plus and have to make a choice. Do we face up to another thirty of forty years alone or do we attempt to get back into the dating game? If you choose to get back into the precarious dating game, where on earth do you start? After all, who wants to start pubbing and clubbing at the age of 50 plus?

Of course, there are those who don't have to face this mammoth task who will suggest helpful things like joining a evening class. You can learn a new skill and meet other like-minded people. Well, that's all very well but what if you spend hours and hours at these classes and there's no one there that you like? You could spend months or even years of your life learning all this great stuff but still finding your evenings lonely and your social life bare because of the lack of a suitable partner.

Increasingly popular these days is the advent of internet dating. In its early days it came with a certain amount of stigma. If you had to resort to internet dating you were seen as somewhat desperate and unable to bag someone by yourself but it is now officially recognised as a respectable and efficient way to meet the right person. It also offers a certain amount of security.

There are websites designed specifically for people aged 50 plus and this helps to filter out the unsuitable age groups for its members. You can scan through the members already listed and if you like the look of someone you can have a read through their profile. This will give you an indication of their likes and dislikes, their interests and hobbies and is a good indication as to whether or not you have anything in common.

You can also put yourself onto one of these sites and sit back and wait for the enquiries to come flooding in. Most people will upload a photograph of themselves alongside their profile and while the older age group understand that outward appearance isn't everything, a certain amount of physical attraction is important.

Internet dating sites also give you the opportunity to get to know someone through email and telephone conversations until you are comfortable enough to meet them in person. It gives you chance to get over any self confidence issues you may have, and these issues affect people of all ages.

Just don't forget that the same rules apply to dating at any age - always let someone know where you are going and who with. So sign up and get back into the dating game - you will soon remember how much you enjoyed it.

Catherine Harvey

Relationship expert Catherine Harvey looks at how online dating is catering to the 50 plus age group.

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