Online Dating Muslims Dilemma

Navigating the online Muslim dating scene can become a devastating situation; these articles will help guide you in the right direction.

There are a few common scenarios that many online daters eventually experience, and each one can seem like a stumbling block, impeding the way to a happier, brighter love life. The most common experience—and often one of the first—is the impulse sign up period; you browse a couple promising profiles that catch your interest, and you can't help but to rush and sign up, posting a first draft profile. The second most common experience is that moment of first contact, but you're unsure of how to proceed, or that if you should take down your profile entirely. And then there's that online Muslim dating overload sensation, a feeling of burn out. We can help; follow our advice for a more enjoyable online Muslim dating adventure.

Ok, I've just created a new profile, and I'm ready to meet new Muslims, but how do I proceed? What do I do?

So you've just signed up and are ready to take the online Muslim dating world by storm. You may be tempted to contact a large number of Muslims—anyone with cap, hijab or beard; this "spam" approach to online Muslim dating is a bad move. This desperate approach really won't get you very far in the online Muslim dating world. Pick and choose five to six Muslims and see if anyone of them works out; if not, move on to several more. Don't overwhelm yourself, casting out a big Muslim dating net, seeing if someone bites—you're not on a race against time. Take it simple my friend; have fun and enjoy yourself.

It's always sensible to keep your Muslim dating prospects to a manageable number. You don't want to become confused, mixing up profiles, confusing and tangling interests, hobbies and turnoffs with a myriad of Muslims. Is Khadeejah the one who likes combining rocky road with strawberry ice cream, or is she the one who dislikes rainy days? Is it Qasim or Umar who would rather curl up with a good Hadeeth book than watch an Islamic lecture? I can't remember! Keeping notes is a good way to manage all your contacts; you don't want them thinking that you have a hundred people in your Muslim dating queue. Don't give them the wrong impression.

By reading a few emails, it's very common for Muslims just like any other normal emotional people to believe that they've found their true soul mate. Every word that person writes in their email strikes a romantic chord, and you can't seem to find a single flaw—they're perfect! Don't build up your expectations too high; you've only just passed the first of many stages. After then initial email exchanges, start with a few friendly phone chats. Get to know the Muslim brother or sister on an intellectual level; you may soon discover that your potential hook up doesn't quite fit the image you had in your mind, and this could save you a lot of wasted energy. Three weeks is a good amount of time before you're ready for the next level—the first in-person meeting!

Our relationship is perfect; we're getting serious. What do I do now?

There comes a time when you ask yourself "is it time to take down my profile?" You've found your perfect Muslim match and now you're wondering about your profile floating around in Muslim dating wonderland. The important question is basically this: "is this the only Muslim I want to see?" If the answer is yes, then you should have no reservations about taking down your profile. You may be tempted to wait for the other Muslim to take down his profile first, taking that as a sign to reciprocate their good intentions. It's up to you. The most excellent course would be to just take down your profile when you feel the time is right, and don't even tell the other person; chances are they'll see that you have and will ask you about it.

Don't make yourself suffer by incessantly checking your newly found Muslim sweetheart's profile, crossing your fingers, hoping that it has been taken down for good. Avoid this—if you find yourself constantly performing repetitive profile checks, go do something else; watch Islamic TV programs, read an Islamic book, exercise—anything to avoid the urge to spy. If you simply can't stop the nagging urges, there's a simple solution: just ask!

Refuse to go along with the notion of raising a guilt trip, claiming that since you've taken your profile down, it's high time that they do the same. And don't perform the grade school antic of "if you don't take it down, I don't want to see you anymore". For starters, simply state that you feel a nice connection with them; ask them if they are ready to date you exclusively. If your potential lover says no, then you'll have to make your mind up if you can live with that type of Muslims keeping their "options open", so to speak. Often, confidence is a major turn on—it greatly amplifies your adventurous, outgoing personality; if they don't want to take down their profile just yet, you way want to reply with something like: "Well, that's cool with me, but I don't think you'll come across another catch like me anywhere else."

I'm experiencing Muslim dating overload; am I becoming world-weary towards online Muslim dating?

It's often a good idea to take a hiatus from the Muslim online social scene—take breaks for reflection and to replenish your spirit. Scrolling through the profiles of hundreds of potential Muslim mates can become tiresome, and you may even feel like giving up the search all together. The best recommendation is not to give up. The jaded feelings that are swirling around inside your head are—like all things in life—temporary. Go offline and take a break from your computer. Don't check back until a couple weeks have passed; you need time to rejuvenate—you'll be glad you did.

Once you get back into the mix, you'll need to perform an analysis of what went wrong the last time you were sweetheart hunting for a Muslim partner. What are you doing that needs enhancement? Are you asking for dates too soon? Do you have a picture up on your profile?

Like everything in life, excess in anything is never a good idea for a Muslim. Limiting the amount of time you spend online can be very helpful—long bouts of searching is sure to make your eyes bulge and your head pop. Always give yourself some time to rest your head and eyes. Step away for a few hours—during this window of time new people may have signed up, boosting your excitement and chances of finding that special Muslim.