Should a Man Relate to a Woman on Her Level?

The following is an excerpt from the book, Why Women Love Bastards, which can be found at http://whywomenlovebastards.com

Unlike the many, many 'no more mr. nice guy' books, the answer to getting and keeping women is not to become more aggressive. Sheesh! What some 'lead-me-by-the-nose' Nice Guys will believe! Let me tell you, there are some really aggressive Nice Guys, and they still score a big, fat ZERO on a woman's "gotta have" list. Aggression has nothing to do with being a Real Man, and is not the answer to becoming the Bastard That Women Love!

And neither is trying to mold yourself into being just like her!

You must allow her to be a woman, but don't twist yourself into a pretzel to try to understand and relate to her on her level. Forget all the so-called 'expert' relationship advice you may have gotten and all the self-help books you may have read, and purge every Oprah and Dr. Phil show memory that you may have stored in your brain's database.

Contrary to popular belief women really don't want a man that understands them, makes cute little sympathetic sighing noises as she rambles on and on, or changes his manly ways and learns how to grow a flower garden because she likes flowers. She doesn't want a man who runs the water while he relieves himself lest she hears his tinkling noise and becomes offended, and she especially doesn't want a man that can sit there for hours and talk about feelings and who's cheating who.

She also doesn't want a man that holds her hand while flitting through every store in the mall, dutifully carrying her bags and packages or meekly trailing behind her as she picks up one item after another... "oh, isn't this dress just so 'cute'...? Millie has one similar to it, you know? Oh, and did I tell you what Millie told me about Linda? Well! It seems that Linda was at Eva's place the other night and she told Judy that Bill had gone down to Mike's and..."

She doesn't want too much equal power in her relationships, and she, especially, doesn't want the higher power (even though she thinks she does, she will lose respect for a man that gives it to her). And if she needs someone who understands her as a woman let her call her girlfriends, as you just can't do that! You are a man and you only know how to be as a man.

She also doesn't want little love letters left out for her to swoon over - unless you have screwed up. In that case, a love (apology) letter then gives her the hope that she is making some headway or advancement in her genetically pre-programmed efforts to 'change' you. (P.S. boys, this is what keeps her hooked to you.) So men, make sure that you do carry out those little manly screw ups (like being insensitive) now and then so you can be all humble and apologetic :) ... you don't want to be too perfect, but you do want her to think that she's making some progress at reforming you into a woman!

By Tigress Luv, the Breakup Guru