Good and Bad Aspects of Divorce

Opting for divorce creates a lot of trauma and emotional disturbance in the lives of the people. Different people involved in divorce react differently to the situation. For some, it is a liberating experience, giving them space for their intellectual and spiritual growth. For others, it may create financial problems leading to a drastic drop in their standard of living. Some may have to move away from their children for ever.

How to adapt to life after divorce depends on the temperament of the individuals. Some make full use of their new-found freedom and enjoy life to the hilt by exploring new horizons. On the other hand, many divorcees keep sulking and thinking all the time about their terrible past.

Divorce changes your life in different ways. Sometimes, it is for the better.

Individual Liberty: In marriage, you are duty-bound to behave in a manner which would be acceptable to your partner. Your likings, tastes and hobbies should conform to those of your partner. This drastically curtails your individual freedom. After divorce, you become free to live your life the way you want. You have the freedom to socialise and come home any time you want. You do not have to give an explanation about your actions to anybody. You can pursue the career of your choice and indulge in your hobbies.

New Beginning in Life: Divorce enables you to start your life afresh. You are free from the restrictive atmosphere of marriage. You no longer have to go through any type of verbal or emotional abuse. You can choose your lifestyle according to your capability and liking without any opposition from anyone, live in any city of your choice, travel anywhere in the world and plan your life as you want.

Romantic Life: Marriage imposes certain duties and obligations on you in life. After saying your sacred vows with your partner, you cannot think of having any physical relationship outside the relationship. It creates a sense of guilt in you if you find yourself attracted to someone. But divorce gives you the freedom to pursue your love interests. You can start dating again and experiment with your love life. If you find somebody attractive and suitable to your aspirations, you can again think of going for a long and steady relationship that may result in marriage.
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Financial Empowerment: After marriage, your assets and finances are merged with your partner’s. Your decisions about buying something new are to a large extent influenced by your spouse’s liking and disliking. You may be earning well but if your spouse is a spend-thrift, you may not be able to save enough and live your life like the way you want. However, after divorce you have your whole income to spend on yourself. You can not only have enough savings but also have the kind of lifestyle you have always wanted. You can buy anything you want without seeking permission of anyone.

However, divorce is not all fun and games. There are many negative consequences too, such as follows:

Single Parenting: Children are actually the ones who suffer the most due to parental divorce. They need both the parents for their emotional nourishment and support. As a single parent, you realise that you are working doubly hard juggling the household work with your job and managing the children. You have to run in all directions, dousing fires. You hardly get any time for your own leisure and comfort.

Financial Problems: Generally, after marriage, the responsibility of earning bread for the entire family comes on the husband’s shoulders while the wife takes care of children and manages household work. She often leaves her career and devotes herself fully to family life.

In such a scenario, if divorce happens, then it is the wife who bears the brunt and suffers the most. She has to immediately look for a suitable job according to her qualifications. This is not an easy task because so many years of being out of the job market proves to be a disadvantage for her.

If her children are young, then the financial burden increases even more as the woman has to hire a reliable and full-time baby sitter to look after the kids. She is now responsible for taking care of household expenses such as house rent and educational fees of the children. If the woman is not qualified enough or does not have any professional degree as well as experience that are required for getting a good job, then it will add substantially more problems to her already hard-pressed life.

The husband also has to suffer financially after divorce as all the family assets get divided between him and his ex-wife and he also has to pay maintenance to her for many years.

Emotional Insecurity: Divorced people live a lonely life. They do not have anybody to share their feelings and give them emotional support in the times of crisis and challenges. They do not get the security and the feeling of intimacy of the kind that married people enjoy in their day-to-day lives.