Handshaking and the American Family: Teaching Culture Lessons

Thousands of Americans and other native English speakers travel abroad every year to teach English in Japan, Asia, and around the globe. At Aaron Language Services, most of our teaching work has been with Japanese students, but we have also worked with other Asian students and students around the globe. American culture, and culture from around the world, fascinates English students in Japan. Many English students around the world share this fascination. In this article, we would like to share two pieces of culture that we teach about in Japan: handshaking and the changing American family. If you teach English in Japan or anywhere else around the world, these two items may be of interest to your students too.

Handshaking

The American handshake has several basic components. The first basic component is that the handshake is quick. First the hand moves up, then down, and then returns to the original position. The handshake is not a pumping exercise. Nor is it a hand-holding exercise. The handshake goes back to extending your hand so the person you are shaking with knows that you are not holding a weapon. The second is that a handshake should be firm, but is not a contest to prove your strength.

Not all Americans have mastered these two concepts. Some Americans pump hands up and down. Others try to prove their strength. Most Americans, however, understand the two basic concepts. Many abroad do not, creating negative impressions with Americans when they shake hands. We teach our students that the handshake may be important to many Americans. The impression they make when shaking hands can influence their future relationships.

The handshake also has varieties. Some people use their left hand to cover the other person's hand while shaking with their right hand. Many people think this shows more sincerity. The handshake also has some remaining gender issues. Long ago, men shook hands; women did not. Today, almost all men and women shake hands.

Reading about shaking hands can be a little dry and lack clarity. If you are teaching abroad, you may want to try talking about handshaking and demonstrating. Then, have your students practice. For teaching ESL in America and other English speaking countries, this may be too basic for many students. For students freshly arrived, however, such explanations and culture tips, along with practice can be helpful.

The new American family

Not that long ago, many Americans thought of the typical family as a father, mother, and two children in the suburbs. Every morning the father would leave for work; the mother would stay at home with the children. While many families were like this, this image was more an ideal or stereotype than reality. We often look back through rose-tinted glasses, ignoring many Americans. Not all Americans lived such apparently happy suburban lives. Many women had to work. Many Americans could not afford to live in the suburbs. Not all male workers earned enough to support families. Not all Americans got married. Some families had single mothers and grandparents raised the children in some families. Single people, gay people, and people of color existed, but they were rarely mentioned.

America has changed since then. The vast majority of Americans realize that there are many kinds of families. The image of a white family with a stay-at-home mother, a working father, and two children has faded. Americans now see families with two gay parents, families with single mothers or single fathers, interracial families and other kinds of families. They also see many people living alone. Many Americans have become more accepting of other ways of living, and Americans with these other ways of living are now more open about their life patterns. This family diversity appears in movies, on television shows, and in books. Some people may still have problems accepting everyone, but America has come a long way since the days when the image of the suburban family reigned supreme.

If you teach English abroad, the reaction of your students and their interest in these topics will vary given their background and knowledge. These topics may not be the right ones for your students. If not, your challenge is to find the right ones. Almost all English students around the globe are interested in the culture where English is used. English is more than a language; students want to learn the culture too.