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Joke yourself
More golf jokes for our readers. Enjoy!
Two ants were in a sand trap watching a duffer flailing away. "Quick," said the one ant to the other. "Get on the ball before he kills us."
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It was a sunny Saturday morning, and Jim was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing his upcoming shot when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker - "Would the gentleman on the Ladies tee please back up to the men's tee, please!"
Jim was still deep in his routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement - "Would the man on the women's tee kindly back up the men's tee!"
Jim had had enough. He shouted, "Would the announcer in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot!"
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A golfer ran into a friend he not seen for years at the driving range one day. They talked about their games, their swings, and all sorts of things. Eventually, one of them said, "How's the family?" The other replied, "Oh, pretty good. I got a new set of clubs for the wife the other day!" "Hey, good trade!" replied the friend!
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Rab addressed the ball and took a magnificent swing but somehow, something went wrong and a horrible slice resulted. The ball went onto the adjoining fairway and hit a man full force. He dropped!
Rab and his partner ran up to the stricken victim who lay, quite unconscious, with the ball between his feet.
"Good heavens" said Rab, "what shall I do?"
"Don't move him" said his playing partner, "if we leave him here he becomes an immovable obstruction and you can either play the ball as it lies or drop it
two club lengths away."
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