Learn How To Find The ‘Inner Golf Coach’

When I took my qualifications to become a Coach, I remember that one of the first training modules I was taught was all about effective questioning skills. It made me re-think about, not only how I presented questions to other people, but also the manner in which I questioned myself.

This is because asking the right question creates curiosity potentially opening doors in the mind that you may have locked away, closed or forgotten.

Curiosity is not about prying, but can lead to really unexpected discoveries for the person to whom the question is being directed.

How can I apply this?

Curiosity starts with a question. If I were to say to you now ‘I wonder …’ what would happen? Your mind would automatically go searching for an answer to the rest of the question. As human beings we are predisposed to go looking for the answer as soon as a question is posed. Being curious changes the direction of the conversation or our thoughts and will often lead to a path of discovery.

Try this exercise:

Let me give you an example of a question that simply gathers information versus one that creates curiosity.

For instance if I were to ask you ‘What golf coaching options were available to you at the moment?’ how would your response differ to if I asked you ‘What would you like to know that you do not know right now?'

In the first example we would go for an accurate assessment of the golf lessons available and you may answer ‘perhaps a putting lesson would be best’.

But, if you were to answer the more thought invoking second question you might begin to look deeper and say ‘I would like to know how to be less anxious when playing a four foot putt to win the hole’.

Can you see that this could result in an alternative solution to having a normal putting lesson, as the problem here suggests a mind issue rather than a playing issue.

From a coaching point of view being curious enables the Coach to step out of the role of being an ‘expert’ and instead allow the client to find the answers from within themselves.

Every person has the correct answers within themselves. By asking yourself the appropriate questions the effect of finding the answers will be very energizing because you have worked out the answer. Curiosity allows the client to look for their own answers.

It is also effective learning that lasts, because you are finding the answers within you.

How many times has a friend or relative given you good advice but you haven’t taken it! This is because you have not come up with the solution yourself. You are more likely to change your behaviour and act upon advice if YOU have found the answer in the first place.

Many of you will have read the tips and tools that come from my ‘Confidence Caddie’ programme. The reason I named it that was because I wanted to enable you to become your own best friend and to find your ‘Inner Caddie’. You can talk to yourself without being crazy!

Learning how to find that inner coach starts with asking yourself really effective questions; questions which will help you to become a more confident golfer.

In my CD series every topic begins with AWARENESS because without this how are you going to make those changes that will help you to become a better golfer?

Do you ever stop and ask yourself why you do the things you do? Usually it is because this is the way you have always done it.

Learning to ask yourself effective questions is one of the most powerful tools you can use to achieve the results you seek on and off golf course. Knowing that the answers lie within and that you have the means of finding them is one big step towards playing fun and confident golf.

I am going to leave you with a couple of questions to get you started on this subject that will really help you in those most anxious moments on the golf course.

Firstly, next time you feel those first tee jitters or you freeze as you are about to take that all-important putt, in fact anytime you hear yourself saying something negative to yourself; I want you to stand back, take a breath, and ask yourself –

Question 1 -‘How is feeling and thinking like this helping me to play golf the way I want to?’

Of course you are going to answer – ‘Well it isn’t!’ But now you have the choice, because you have created the awareness and allowed yourself to stop for a moment, to do something about it.

Question 2 – ‘So, what do I need to do to stop feeling like this?’

Again look for a positive and constructive response always. You may wish to start your pre-shot routine all over again but this time ensuring that you are ready to commit when it comes to taking the shot. Whatever you choose to do it begins with awareness and taking the time to ask yourself an effective question to help you to stop thinking and feeling in a negative way.

Of course you do not need have to wait to question yourself as you are standing over an important shot you can use Question 1 at any point in your round when you start to think and feel negatively.

This is the beginning for you to start working with the ‘Inner Caddie’ inside you. So good luck and enjoy trying out the questions. You need to repeat this process again and again – do not just try it once and expect miracles. This is a tool you can use forever – on and off the golf course – and it will really help to empower you.

Finally I will leave you with what we in the coaching world call an ‘enquiry’ question. Ask yourself the following and not only take your time with finding the answer but have real fun with the answers -

‘What if I truly believed that I was unstoppable – how would this impact on my game?’