The Middle Child

Many experts have studied the placement of children in the birth order of the family unit and have discovered that each group displays certain traits and characteristics. Oldest children tend to be born leaders while younger children tend to be affectionate and creative. Middle children characteristics are a little harder to pinpoint as these youngsters usually stand apart from the other children.

Growing up as a middle child can make the youngster feel like they go unnoticed by his parents. The oldest children are held in high esteem due to their accomplishments while the youngest are coddled and babied. The middle child may feel as if he has to struggle just to get noticed. Parents tend to expect more from their youngest and oldest children as it may be difficult for them to define their expectations for the middle child. In most cases, parents may have taken pictures and documented every "first" that their oldest child did and may have lightened up these efforts in relationship to the second child. While the parents may have done this as a result of being more relaxed about their second experience at parenthood, a middle child may view this as solid proof that they mean less to their parents than their older sibling.

The middle child may also constantly compare themselves to the other siblings, especially the older ones. He may seek interests in different areas that will allow them to stand apart from their elder. This attention-seeking attitude also tends to make the middle children the "risk-takers," often participating in dangerous sports or choosing careers that have an element of danger and/or risks involved.

Parents can take several steps to ensure that their middle child evolves into a happy and healthy adult. They need to focus on the accomplishments of the middle child and make sure that praise is given where it is deserved. You should also try not to compare your children with each other. Holding one child apart as the role model can be detrimental to the development of self esteem in the others.

You also need to encourage your children to work out their disagreements on their own. The middle child may become too dependent on you to fix his problems. Children can learn good negotiating and diplomacy skills from solving their problems between each other on their own.

You may need to spend some extra quality time with your middle child. Oldest and youngest children seem to need your attention more than the middle child does, which is oftentimes misleading. The middle child may not seem to want your attention due to the fact that many middle children are often more emotionally withdrawn and distant from the rest of the family than their siblings. This is an even greater reason to spend more time with them.

There are some good traits that are exhibited by middle children. These children grow up to be more independent and are born mediators and negotiators. They also tend to "go their own way" when dealing with established ideas. They are innovators and thinkers. Some famous middle children include J.F.K., Madonna, Donald Trump, Barbara Walters, and Bill Gates. Each of these people is an example of just how successful middle children can become with a little extra encouragement from their parents. Each of them have "gone their own way" and become role models for others. By supporting your middle child in his tendency to go against the status quo, he may grow to be as successful as some of these middle children have become. The possibilities are endless.