Tottenham jokes for Chelsea fans!

If you are a Tottenham supporter i’m sorry (No you’re not! – Ed.).

I’m bored, so with no news about, i just thought i’d make up a little collection of Tottenham jokes to cheer up the Chelsea fans on the net.

I have picked out only the funniest ones i could find. Enjoy!
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“I met this really kinky girl last night. ‘Humiliate me,’ she said … So I bought her a Tottenham shirt!”
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A young boy goes to social services and tells them he has nowhere to live. “What about your parents?” asks the social worker. “No, they beat me,” says the boy. “What about your grandparents?” says the social worker. “No, they beat me even harder!” says the boy. “Well … where do you want to stay then?” replies the social worker. “Tottenham,” says the boy. “They don’t beat anyone.
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Many moons ago when I was at school, two of my mates were Spurs supporters. They would go to White Hart Lane and wait for about ten minutes after kick off and climb over the wall. One Saturday a policeman caught them and he made them go back in and watch the rest of the game!
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A man was found dead floating in the Thames, wearing a blond wig, full make-up, bra, knickers, suspenders and a Spurs shirt. Before informing the next of kin the police removed the Spurs shirt to save the family embarrassment.
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A man is sitting in a pub with his Jack Russell dog one Saturday afternoon. The football results are coming up on the television in the corner, “Liverpool 2, Tottenham Hotspur 1,” reads the announcer in his normal, rather sedate, voice.

Suddenly the Jack Russell dog jumps up and shouts out, “Oh, no, not again.”

The shocked landlord says, “That’s amazing. Why did he say that when the result was announced that Tottenham lost?”

“Because he’s a Spurs supporter,” the dog’s owner replies.

The landlord then asked what the dog says when Tottenham win a match, to which the man replied, “I don’t know. I’ve only had him three years.”