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How to Forgive an Affair If You Also Made Some Mistakes

Many times, the victim of the affair forgoes deciding how to forgive an affair because of their own guilt over mistakes they have made themselves.  I can distinctly remember when someone would do me wrong in some way, I would sometimes think "well, that's what I get for doing this or that wrong in the past".  The same theory applies here, and can really destroy any chances of reconciliation in a relationship fallen victim to an illicit affair.

  If you have any sort of guilt for your shortcomings in the relationship, you must first forgive yourself, then seek forgiveness from your partner.  Not every relationship that suffers an affair is the fault of both parties, but there are more than one would think.  Learning how to forgive an affair will become much easier if this is recognized by both involved, and used positively to rebuild the foundation of the relationship.

  Once you seek and receive forgiveness from your partner (the cheater), you will find it much easier to genuinely forgive them for their infidelity.  It can be used as a common starting point for reconciliation.  Acknowledging that both people share some of the blame gives you both at least some sort of common ground to start from.  Something you can both relate to in each other.  How are you expected to forgive an affair if you have guilt?  I think of it along the same sort of lines as the famous quote "you can't love someone else until you love yourself".  Start with acknowledging any mistakes you made, forgive yourself, seek forgiveness, then work on the other, much bigger issue of the affair itself

Michael

When an affair is involved, the road to relationship recovery is extremely difficult at best.  Most times, both parties share some of the blame.  Recognizing this and using it productively in the healing process makes deciding and learning  how to forgive an affair much easier and your chances of success become exponentially greater.  A wonderful step by step, take you by the hand guide exists that covers this and much more about putting your marriage/relationship back on track.  Getting past the guilt and figuring out how to forgive an affair even when you made mistakes is a tricky, slippery slope.  Don't go it alone

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