Ask Yourself, Am I an Encourager?

I mean, what kind of an effect do I have on people that I know and meet? Is the room brighter after I leave because the impact I had, or is it darker? We've all met people that can suck the life out of others.



As a leader, part of my job is to encourage and lift up those around me. You can think about it like everyone having a bucket that starts empty each day. As they get positive input, their bucket gets filled up. When their bucket is full it overflows and they too, become encouragers. On the other hand, when they receive negative comments and feedback or sarcasm, their bucket gets emptier.  So, what about you? Are you a bucket filler or a bucket dipper?


Maybe a simple comment on a piece of clothing or jewelry. Maybe just showing a slight interest in the person. People are hurting and are under a lot of stress these days. When we stand in line at the grocery store, are we so focused on ourselves and getting out of there and making frustrating sounds when the line isn't moving fast enough, or do we take a moment to look around us, at the people in line or maybe the cashier and get an idea of how their day might be going.


Telling the checker that you could never do her job and stay so calm when the lines get so long and people start to get irritated, might give them a brief moment of connection. Maybe the women in front of you looks like they took a little extra time to throw their look together and, if your a guy, you can comment by saying something about how your wife or girlfriend would love whatever it is you find stylish. If your a women, it's easy enough to just offer the compliment without it seeming like flirting.


When you introduce someone to another, do you just say this is my friend so and so? How about the next time you introduce two people, tell them each something positive about each other. It may seem strange, but If I were to say "This is my friend John, we've known each other for over 10 years. If you ever need work done around your house, this is the guy to call. I've seen him create awesome decks, basements, kitchens, you name it. If it requires a tool belt, this is your guy. I mean, I like to build stuff, but he really knows how to make it look good."


How do you think your friend John would feel? What would the person you introduced him to feel like?  John's bucket would be getting filled and the other person would see the respect you have for him and maybe learn something about him that might not come up in basic conversation. 


I know that i'm not the best at this and definitely fall into the selfish, what about me attitude sometimes, but when I make a conscious effort to lift someone up, I see the positive effect that it has on them in the moment, and possibly the rest of the day. It also has a "pay-it-forward" effect on others they interact with throughout the day. I also know how it makes me feel.



So give it a try. As you go about your day, look up around you and notice people. You will find that as you become a bucket filler, people around you will begin to fill your bucket as well.