Affairs and Your Marriage: Why Do Women Cheat?

Infidelity is on the rise. We hear about it more and more each day, especially from celebrities. Many people, when you think about cheating spouses, automatically think that it is a husband cheating on a wife. This, however, is not always the case.

Men are not the only philanderers. Women are also committing adultery. In fact, some studies suggest that almost 50% of married women have had sex outside of their marriage. Cookie Magazine did a study back in May that found 34% of moms admitted to having an affair after they had children, and another 53% say they have thought seriously about having an affair.

This says that it's not just men having affairs. We hear all of the time about why men affairs, but women having affairs never seems to be a focus. So, why do women have affairs?

Women Cheat For Emotional Reasons

Whether it's a lack of communication in their marriage, a need for an emotional connection they are not receiving, or just the desire to feel wanted and beautiful, women are cheating to fill emotional voids their husbands have left them with.

Women also crave the need for security. Men are the blanket that provides this security, and if you as a husband aren't satisfying this need, she will seek it elsewhere. As women age, they tend to feel less and less secure. They begin to question the way they look, feel less attractive, and unable to do things they did when they were younger. Even if these things aren't true, women tend to convince themselves that they are.

If you are not reassuring your wife that she is beautiful and important to you, you are putting your relationship at risk.

Other Reasons Women Cheat

*Sense of Loneliness
*Insecurity
*Disappointment with their spouse
*Depression
*Lack of Romance

Profile of a Female Cheater

Now that we've covered some reasons why women cheat, lets profile the typical female philanderer.

*Women tend to choose partners who are also married. This offers some safety for them, as they have less of a concern to worry about STD's. They also don't have to worry about the "secret" getting out, as the married man also would have no benefit of leaking the truth. Last, it puts a limit on the amount of time they can spend with their lover if he is also married.

*Women who cheat on their spouse are more likely to be a full-time worker. Men in the workplace can tend to make the women feel important, if she is doing a good job, notice the woman, and take an interest in her.

*Women don't jump into affairs. They tend to know the person they are cheating with for a couple of months or more before they actually cheat on their spouse. This proves the stat from Cookie Magazine that 53% of married women with children say they've contemplated an affair.

*They don't always want a "bad boy". In fact, They are looking for the "ideal husband", someone who can provide the security, communication, financial, and emotional needs they currently lack.

Myths About Adultery

As you learn more and more about affairs, you will begin to understand their true meaning and place for existence. You will also be able to dispel some common myths.

1. An affair can help your troubled marriage. No, it cannot help. It will only worsen the problems you are already having. What it can do is open your spouse's eyes to the trouble and ignite a plan to address those problems.

2. Bad Sex Causes People to Have an Affair. No, this is not true either. Sex is just that, sex. It is all the same, really, until you add emotion to it. Sex can become worse if one person feels it is a problem, an insecurity, and begins to turn sex into what it never should be, a performance. Great sex comes from sharing yourself, mentally and emotionally, with your partner, which creates a deep trust between the two of you.

3. Affairs Can Last Forever. False. Affairs die for the same reasons marriages do, the lack of intimacy. If you are having an affair and think it is a wonderful relationship, it is because you are hiding the imperfections from one another. You never truly get to know the real person you are with. If you care enough about getting to know someone, get to know your spouse. Affairs lack the emotion necessary to sustain long term.

What To Do If You Are Tempted To Cheat

I hope you are not tempted to cheat, but if you are, think about it first. Typically when you have this feeling, there are problems going on in your relationship. Try addressing those problems and see if you and your spouse can work through them.

Learn to communicate better with your spouse. Create a transparency, where you know everything about your spouse, and they know everything about you. Spend time together every day, and learn something new about them. Find new activities that you both can enjoy together. Never stop dating your spouse!

Women really crave the emotional things, so men really need to work at giving them those things. If you are a women, you need to share with your husband what you are craving and lacking. If you are a man, work on satisfying those needs. If you do, you can live a happy marriage together!