The state of New Hampshire just became the latest to legalize gay marriage. As this trend continues, more and more same-sex couples will find themselves with the opportunity to formalize their union. Then the question becomes, how to plan the perfect wedding?
Of course a gay wedding will have all of the same basic features of any other wedding, but there are some practical differences that will arise, as well as perhaps some stylistic differences. Often the couple may wish to have a slightly less traditional ceremony, with more personal elements interwoven into the design of the wedding. In addition, certain parts of the traditional marriage ceremony may seem awkward or inappropriate, meaning that an alternative should be selected.
The place to begin with any wedding is the invitations. Typically in a same sex marriage, the couple will have their names on the invitation as the hosts. The wording would be something like this: The pleasure of your company / is requested at the marriage of / John Howard / to / Robert Young / Saturday the twentieth of June / two thousand and nine / at four o'clock in the afternoon. For a ceremony in a house of worship, you would replace "the pleasure of your company" with "the honour of your presence". The easiest way to decide whose name should be listed first on the invitation is to do it alphabetically.
In a traditional marriage ceremony, the bride is escorted down the aisle by her father and "given away" to the groom. This symbolism does not really work for a gay marriage, and so most couples prefer to find a different way to make their entrance. One of the more popular choices is for the couple to walk down the aisle together. If the pair has supportive parents, it would also be nice for each partner to be escorted down the aisle by both sets of parents.
The next question is one of attire. For two men, the answer is more straightforward. They will usually both wear a tuxedo or a suit, depending on the formality of the wedding. In the case of tuxedos, they will likely be identical; if suits are preferred, you could choose to wear the same suit, or each gentleman could choose his own, perhaps with coordinating neckties. When it is two brides, the question of wedding attire is more wide open. Some couples like to wear matching dresses, others choose two different dresses, and still others will choose one dress and one suit. It is all a matter of your personal preference; as long as both brides dress with a similar degree of formality, they will look great.
Gifts are customarily exchanged as part of a wedding, especially gifts of jewelry. When there are two grooms, the wedding jewelry gifts will likely consist of the wedding bands and perhaps a watch or a pair of silver cufflinks, engraved with a special inscription. Two brides will usually exchange wedding bands as well, and may also wish to surprise one another with another thoughtful gift on the morning of the wedding.
After the marriage ceremony, it is on to the reception, followed by a romantic honeymoon. There are many great destinations that are friendly and welcoming to same-sex newlyweds, such as Provincetown, Key West, San Fransisco, and New York. Wherever you choose to go, a fun and relaxing honeymoon is the perfect ending to a wedding, and a great start to married life.
Bridget Mora writes for Silverland Jewelry about trends, weddings, and style.Gifts of wedding jewelry are a thoughtful way to show how much you care.
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