Successful Marriages and Relationships

  With almost a 50% divorce rate relationships, and more specifically marriages are tough. I have been married for twenty wonderful years. With a few rough spots, but we always overcame them and felt closer as a couple because of them. People often ask me, "How do I make my marriage work?" Well I tell them that they just answered their own question. Marriage takes a little work. Couples that are married or couples that are dating need to work on a few things to make the relationship last.

1. Communication

 2. Consideration

3. Compromise

4. Commitment

The four "C’s" of any health relationship. You must communicate with your lover. To keep things from each other is the fall of most marriages and relationships. If one of the partners is holding back and not expressing their feelings that is going to turn into an issue. Say for instance a wife can not stand the way her husband stays at work late into the night all the time. She also works, but she make it a priority to be home when he is to share each others company. Now he may think he is doing right by her by trying to get ahead and create a good life for the two of them. She may feel the exact opposite. The difference comes where he thinks money is going to make her happy. When in fact she believes that a healthy marriage is based on quality time spent together. She does not want the extra $5,000 dollars a year she would rather just have him around. She needs to let him know this. He may not totally agree but that brings us to the next "C".

Consideration is what happens after a concern is communicated. In our example an issue has come up regarding a husband at work too much. The wife has expressed she feels he’s working too much, and would like him to pay more attention to her. Regardless of how he feels he needs to be able to listen, absorb, think, then react. By doing this he is going to be a considerate husband. Usually relationship consideration happens by meeting half way.

The third "C" is compromise. Compromise in a relationship happens all the time. From choices on where to eat dinner, to what house to buy. Usually people don’t have to compromise unless they have to because of a volatile situation. The key is to stop these situations before they begin. If both partners in a couple can try and make every situation a "win win" the marriage feels more equal and everyone is happy. For our married couple concerned about the husbands time spent at work a compromise is needed. They need simply to compromise on the number of hours he spends at work. He still needs to work a little extra because that makes him feel good about himself, but the husband also needs to respect his wife’s wishes and come home early a couple days a week. Everybody wins!

The fourth and most important "C" is commitment. To make all of this work both husband and wife in the marriage need to be committed to make it work. This means everyday! Do a little something for each other to let them know that they are the reason for doing everything, and they would not trade that for anything in the world. I hope that all your relationships and marriages are good happy unions of souls. Above all else it is imperative to remember that no couple is perfect, and whenever the relationship has problems, and it is inevitable the all relationships will use the four "C’s" and see your way to happiness. This is just the beginning, to see more go to www.what-is-marriage-about.blogspot.com