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Sunset Trouble in Paradise: Appreciating Your Mature Marriage
Author: Chuck Chamberlain  | Posted: 06-03-2008 | Comments: 0 | Views: 10 | Rating: (53)  (?) 
 Something was wrong with the sunset. I had assigned the couples at our Cozumel marriage retreat the task of wandering off and enjoying the “beautiful sunset” together. The rules of the exercise called for silence and for being “in the moment” together. I was having trouble keeping my own rules because, well, quite frankly the sunset was boring.
I wanted to see what I’d seen before . . .
Glorious sunset commanding full attention as sun, sky and water conspire to put on a show. . Fiery clouds on the horizon, their upside-down identical twins reflecting in the water below. . The drama of clouds and sun, like lovers reluctant to part. . Blushing clouds gathering anxiously to wish the sun farewell from the distant horizon. . The sun, making a slow, halting exit while blowing crimson kisses to the giddy clouds from somewhere beyond. . . And below - the watery stage mirroring perfectly the spectrum of brilliant colors, jetting ribbons of yellows, reds, oranges and purples to take the breath away . . .
Ok, I’m getting a little carried away, but that’s the point. Great sunsets can sometimes be “over the top!” But what we were seeing that evening was a “dud.” Somehow, the players on stage were missing their cues. Most notably, the sun dropped out of the sky before the clouds could gather to wish it a proper farewell. With the sun deserting the stage so quickly, water and sky were suddenly left alone to salvage the script and muddle through to the finale. This was poor timing because it happened just when our marriage retreat agenda called for a beautiful sunset.
I glanced nervously at the other couples scattered in comfortable wicker chairs along the deck. Would the disappointing sunset ruin the experience? I must have been speaking aloud because my wife shushed me to silence. I looked at the couples again, expecting them to jump up and yell, “Fraud! Fraud! This marriage retreat is a FRAUD and we demand our money back!” I was actually surprised to see none of them looking over at us or attempting to leave.
With nothing more to lose, I decided to make the best of a bad situation. With new resolve, I held tight to my wife and gazed westward. A minute or two ticked by with no change on the horizon. Once again, I broke the rule and asked her if she thought we should just gather the couples and proceed with the rest of the workshop. Since we couldn’t decide, we continued to sit and watch. What happened next taught me a great lesson.
I first noticed an emerging mellowness that accompanied the loss of detail and color. That green fishing boat anchored just off-shore was becoming less green and my eyes were drawn away from the objects on its deck to appreciate its trim outline in the water. A sail catamaran in the distance transformed into an intriguing triangle silhouette, slowly gliding across my field of vision. The air around us became windless and quiet, as if a noisy concert crowd suddenly hushed to hear just a slight whisper. And the whisper was saying ever so softly, “Watch what happens next.”
As if someone threw a switch, the water itself suddenly started to mutate – moving into an entirely indescribable state. Every student can recite the three states of water – ice, liquid and steam. But what we saw that warm January Cozumel evening defied the lesson books. Turquoise muted first into a dull gray monochrome, then into a kind of glassy, glowing golden foil. Quiet little waves became nothing more than tiny, slightly moving wrinkles in the foil.
From the critic’s corner, this sunset story was really taking shape. Sky and water were doing quite well, thank you very much! Without their brilliant partner, they were performing beautifully onstage and pushing for a rousing encore.
Backlit by the shiny “foil” of the Mayan sea, shapes suddenly appeared in sharp contrast. Remnants of an old, hurricane-damaged dock jutted up from the water as if cut from a dark piece of construction paper and glued carefully onto the shiny background, like a piece of Mexican art – a stage backdrop. As if directed, a black, pelican-shaped piece of “construction paper” whisked from left to right across the foil and passed out of sight. Other shapes, cut from the same paper, were either glued permanently to the golden foil or moved across it by unseen hands.
I realized that in all the spectacular sunsets I’d seen in the past, the more subtle beauty of these moments had been missing. The scene before me was so warm and inviting, I would not have traded it for one with more splash and fanfare. Looking at my wife of thirty years, I remembered the thrill of new passion when we were newlyweds. I couldn’t help but compare it to the subtle, deeper ecstasy in our marriage today. And if I could trade one for the other? Well . . I wouldn’t. I would miss out on far too much.
And yes, above it all that evening . . above the endless straight line of the horizon was a final and distant glow from that missing player. Somehow, he still remembered us. And when I was quieted enough, I could feel the warmth of his farewell kiss . . . one I nearly missed.
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Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/sunset-trouble-in-paradise-appreciating-your-mature-marriage-352334.html
About the Author:Chuck and Laraine Chamberlain provide marriage and relationship retreats and workshops to couples and families through their company – For Every Marriage LLC (www.ForEveryMarriage.com). In addition, they work with relationships in organizations through their company – Chamberlain Leadership Group LLC (www.ChamberlainLeadership.com)
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are me and my man meant to be
How do u tell some one your falling for them??? please help!!!!!!!?
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How do u tell some one your falling for them??? please help!!!!!!!?
this guy told me he liked me the other day and than i saw him today and he wouldnt talk to me like he use to and i really like him but i dont know what to do how can i tell him what i should have said yeasterday?
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We are planning to come to California to get married but are wondering, is there a waiting time before a license is issued, Is there an appliction that must be filled out, Does one have to make an appointment for a license and issuing of a license? We want to have a few people at the ceremony and then all of us go out to a restaurant to celebrate. Any Suggestions?
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Is it love???
By: ConfusedGirl | 20-07-2008
Well thanks for all the advice about the b/f and sex thing. lol : ).. But its like im still scared to tell him cause i never been in love before and i think he is the one for me.. And i don't want to lose him.. you know? i know all girls are suppose to feel this way about a first love and all, but i just don't understand it at all. like am i in love?? or is he the one for me?? How am i suppose to know this.. : ( Well if anyone can help me please do.. Cause like idk sometimes when i have sex with him i worry about getting pregnant and all.. we use a condom but idk. i just get scared.. Well all i got to say is i NEED ADVICE!
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