The Effects of Domestic Violence - The Uncertain Future

One of the effects of domestic violence is illustrated in studies done by organizations like the Coalition for Battered Women. It is believed that when a woman attempts to leave a violent relationship the risk to her increases by a startling seventy five percent.

Why? As the Coalition's executive director Barbara Price states, "He's losing power and control, and that's what it's about." Which means the abuser will do anything to get it back or anything to make sure no one takes it away. That specifically and very directly means the victim.

It's no wonder that many victims of domestic violence choose to stay in the relationship rather than leave. The abuser has told them repeatedly what would happen to them and has given them all too real examples to emphasize the point. It goes without saying that after so much of this the victim figures the situation now is better than the one they could face.

That's a powerful motivator to stay where you are. Yet there is another one that when used in conjunction with the physical assaults keeps the domestic violence victim thoroughly in check. And that is telling them there is no way they could ever make it out in the real world.

When it comes to the effects of domestic violence, verbal abuse in the hands of an expert manipulator is quite powerful. They have gotten your full attention by physically assaulting you so now they need something to make sure the gate stays locked and you have no want or desire to leave.

This is where the verbal violence comes in. It is not just about constant trashing of the victim (although that works pretty well too) but also creating a world where the injured party becomes totally dependent on the abuser.

They are told to a constant drumbeat that it is not possible for them to function like a responsible adult without the abuser present to hold their hand and guide them every step of the way. The never ending violence has destroyed the victims self esteem to such a level that they cannot help but believe it. Even a strong person mentally and emotionally can only take so much. The abuser takes them to the breaking point and beyond.

And much of it can settle on minor day to day activities. If you are getting abused for instance because you did not run a particular errand in a timely fashion then how do you expect to function out in the real world all by yourself?

Of course this is nonsense. The majority of domestic violence victims were doing alright for themselves before they met their abuser. No doubt with the support that is out there they will do alright again when they leave the relationship.

There are many effects of domestic violence but the fact that many victims do not leave and are quite adamant about it tells you how horribly successful this type of manipulation can be.