The Etiquette on Calling Off a Wedding

If you are reading this section, our sympathy goes out to you.  Not because you are calling off your wedding, but the tasks that are ahead of you from this front.  It is not easy to call on those that you were talking about being so happy with and telling them that things just did not work out. 

But, it is a must to do.  The good news is that if you find yourself in a position to call off your wedding, you can get some others to help you to handle this situation.

More than likely, you are in no mood to be telling the world your story as to why it just did not work out.  You may even be a bit overwhelmed with how to do this the right way.  One step at a time is how you will get through it. 

By the way, we do mean both of you since the groom and the bride are responsible for calling off their wedding.

Here are some things to consider about how you should properly call off your wedding.

No Announcement Sent

If no announcement has been sent out about your wedding just yet, then the word about calling off the wedding can be done by simple word of mouth.  In fact, you should only have to tell those that you told yourself.

Announcement Sent

If you or your parents have sent an announcement to your family and friends telling them that you were being engaged, it is important that another formal announcement go out on paper saying that the wedding has been called off.

Newspaper Announcements

If there has been an announcement in the newspaper, then there should be another to say that the nuptials have ended by mutual consent.  No blame or details need to be provided.

Wedding Invitations Sent

If the wedding invitations have been sent out inviting people to your wedding, another formal wedding invitation needs to go out, letting everyone know that the wedding has been canceled.

Close To the Wedding Day

If the wedding day is fast approaching, it is imperative that guests be called and told about the called off state of events.  The first ones to be called are traveling guests.  You should allow everyone to know that things just have not worked out the best and leave it at that.  Do not feel you need to elaborate because things just get twisted here.

Postponing the Wedding

If you have to postpone the wedding, you can do this following the same rules as above.  But, you will want to tell your guests just what has caused the delay in this case.  Whether it be illness or a death, they are likely to understand if you tell them in time.

If you know when the new wedding will take place, that information can be included.  If you do not, another invitation will need to be sent out when the time does come to inform guests.  Do not have a second wedding shower, though.

Calling Off the Wedding after the Wedding Shower

If you have had your wedding shower and you are now canceling your wedding, you will need to take some important steps with your guests and the gifts that you received. 

The gifts given at a wedding shower are given for the bride and the groom to start their new life.  If that is not going to happen, you need to return the gifts to your guest promptly.

You should not open any of your wedding shower gifts until after the bride and groom have been married so as to avoid a problem in this situation.  It is often that a gift may need to be returned for other reasons as well. 

If you have opened the wedding gift that was given to you, contact the gift giver and arrange to pay back the gift giver for the gift itself.  If this is not possible, there should be restitution made in some way.