What Exactly is a Bridal Shower?

The tradition of throwing a bridal shower can be traced directly back to 18th century America. There is one legend that is often told that attributes the tradition to a 16th century Dutch couple who were denied the bride's dowry because her father felt that her choice of man was beneath her station. According to the legend, friends of the couple threw a party and showered them with gifts of items they would need to set up housekeeping in their new home together. Regardless of how the tradition got started, it has grown into an opportunity for friends and family of the bride to get together and have a party.

In the past, it was always assumed that the maid of honor would be the one to host the bridal shower. It was considered taboo for any member of the bride's family to host, as this could be taken as an opportunistic grab for gifts. As times have changed, so have these rules concerning who may or may not host a bridal shower. Now, any close friend or family member of the bride may choose to host a bridal shower for the new bride. Gifts are still a large part of the shower, but the focus is now mainly on having a party to celebrate the bride making her transition from single to married. In many respects, bridal showers today are roughly the female equivalent of the male tradition of a bachelor party.

Scheduling the location of the shower is largely up to the person hosting. A couple of features that need to be taken into account are what type of party this will be and when the invited guests will be available. Different types of parties are better on different days. For example, a formal tea would be appropriate to schedule for a Sunday afternoon in the hostess' garden. If the focus will be more on a girls' night out type party, Friday or Saturday nights at a local club or bar would be a good time and place. Always try to coordinate with the guests to assure that the majority of them will be able to attend at the time and place chosen.
While it used to be understood that the hostess would foot the bill for the entire party, again, times have changed. In today's world, it is not uncommon for the hostess to ask the other guests, except the bride, to chip in or bring something to the party such as refreshments. If the party will be held in a public venue, each guest could contribute funds to pay the bill or time if the group is expected to clean up after themselves. Often, whoever is the most financially able to do so will cover the costs even if this is not the hostess.

Another key note to consider is whether this will be strictly a bridal shower, or a wedding shower where the groom is also invited along with his friends. Modern trends or moving more toward the latter, combining the bridal shower and the bachelor party into one large affair for everyone to enjoy.