Leaving the Safety Zone

This situation, in which a man will choose his fears over his life, is similar to a story I heard a few years ago, looking back, I wish I had heard it many many years ago.

And so it went:

Many years ago in the Atlantic Ocean, there played a fish, for many years, called Lucas.
Lucas had many friends, many acquaintances, during all his years he got to meet many fish, some more successfully than others – but many.
As the years progressed, and he reached the age where in their current in that side of the ocean, it was custom to leave the family and go to a place where he could start his life.

After putting on his best clothes and feeling all excited, he went to open the door, and then the word “just one moment” sounded. When he looked back he saw his mother and father and siblings and a wide array of friends and acquaintances, as we said he knew many in his life.
And everyone came to him and told him something:
Of course all the things were said to help me, and in good intention, to help him and aid him on his journey.

Some told him of the hardship he will undergo and the sights he will see, the feelings he will experience and feel, some even told him, that in this and that situations you must do so and so, or he won’t be able to go on his way, for he might get hurt from sharp stones and coral he does not know, different animals, he better take a hefty amount of pills, pain killers, bandages, shots, so he will be ready for anything.
Some warned him of the many perils, of things you never know where they will appear.

Not necessarily of the journey they themselves went through, but from stories other people told them when they went on the journey, and they were told then it must be true, and they all want Lucas’s wellbeing.
And he sat and sat and sat for a long while, and gave everyone of those people to say his words and recommendation of the best way to go his way.
There was one that found a better way to help, you could say he was a very creative guy, he brought a bag and asked all the people to write on a piece of paper their good proposals, that of course are meant to help their Lucas.
So slowly the bag got bigger and bigger, heavier and heavier, and of course the content of the bag was very important, there were wonderful descriptions of everything that he will see and experience, all the answers he will need when the questions will rise.

All the solutions to every problem and obstacle he might come across,
Some of them wanted his wellbeing so badly that they hid in his bag food, linen, cutlery, clean clothes, masks that will help him if he gets to a place where he doesn’t know anyone – to look more like the locals, so he would not feel like a stranger, or different, god forbid.
There were those who told him not to go, wait a little more, now isn’t the right time, he’s better off waiting till his fins can stand all the current, because today they are still little, and it could be a problem for him and an obstacle, with the serious current in the ocean, not to mention that there are a lot of winds now that affect the current, and of course many told him how unready they think he is right now, and that he better delay his leaving, and less we forget something so important, he must take into consideration that many people are looking at him, and if he does not do well he will give them all something to talk about, and he himself, and his family, might be a target of ridicule.

Of course everything was said for his best interest, and his protection.
The moment came, he went on his way, he passed the place where he used to play with his friends, and past those places where he use to stay and think till now.
After several hours of intense swimming, he was well on his way.
Days passed, nights passed, he found that in his bag there were things that indeed helped him, what kind of food is healthy, where he should sleep, he certainly saw animals he had never seen before.
And there things he added to his bag, such as water become colder when you go deeper, and brighter when they are more shallow.
He definitely saw new colors, and discovered he preferred red over blue.

After several months of swimming, Lucas found himself standing in front of a thing he did not know, this is the end of that familiar place, the same place where he stayed once or twice before,
He had reached a spot where the water got deeper than he was use to, although where he lived was considered deep water, these were much deeper, there he could see the bottom, and what lay in front, some kind of view, you could know where you were headed and what was there, here he couldn’t.
Lucas decided this was a place to stop, rest, and think where to go next.
He sat on a coral and thought: till now, I knew more or less what will happen and happens most of them time, I’ve been to most of the places even before, so its true, I’ve gone a long way, why go on, who knows what’s there, I might get hurt, and then no one will find me, and I’ll die there alone.
I might even get eaten by a shark, because I’ve never been here, and he’s been swimming here for all his life, just waiting for victims like me.
Maybe there’s no bottom here, and they said my fins are still small, I won’t be able to swim up, or even go on, and then I’ll drown.
Who will help me, I’ll be alone.
And if I run out of food, I’ll starve, the closest place to here is home, and it sure is far. But I really want to see what’s over there, and I’ve never been there.
He thought to himself – that’s the only way I can know.
And he went on.
But what if everyone is right, what will it give me, now I’m well, I have my food, the water here isn’t too deep.
I know what’s here, and I know I can handle it.
Who knows what will be there, and how I’ll cope with it, they told me if I go too deep I might get depth intoxication, I’ll lose control, and I’ve no idea what will happen then.
And what if I can’t make it to a better place, to a place where I can do well and from where I can go back and show everyone I’ve succeeded,
If I come back after failing, everyone will laugh at me, ridicule me, I’ll lose my dignity, I won’t be appreciated anymore, they’ll say I’m a failure, what kind of girl will go out with a failure, what kind of people would want to hang around with someone who’s failed.
I’ll be a loser, and then everyone will leave me, and I’ll be alone, and then what, I won’t be worth anything, I’ll die alone.
I’ve seen people like that who die alone and I don’t want to be one of them.
I might lose so much of what I have, its just no worth it.
What am I thinking about it anyways, I’ve got friends, I know where I finish my school, I’ll work in dad’s factory, he said he’ll give it to me when I’m ready.
I’ll be like everyone else, its not like anyone’s went on past this point, although I’ve heard and read there are those who went through, today they’re someplace else, I’ve heard good things about them, but surely they were helped, you can’t do it alone, I hear one of them was very wealthy, and another had someone waiting here for him with rope and guidance.
There were many myths of people who wanted to do it, but those ere just stories, I don’t know any of them. They wrote they had will power, so what I have it to, they wrote they were brave, I’m brave too I’m just not an idiot, I won’t lose everything I have.
If that means I’ll make less money I don’t care.
I’d rather make less and lose all.

After a few days that Lucas was sitting, and of course thinking about what he should do, there appeared a fish, by the way he was swimming Lucas deduced that this fish came there more or less from the direction he came from.
The fish was more or less the same size and age, and may just be on the same journey. While he came closer, Lucas quickly got to cleaning the surroundings, so to not give out the impression that he doesn’t clean up after himself – he is going greet a guest, after all.
He washed his face, and waited for the fish to arrive, he thought that the fish will see the same sight he did, and will stop to rest and eat, why would it be any other way – he’s just like he is.
And here the fish came closer, and closer, went by Lucas, saw he was indeed reaching the edge, and there he stopped, he did stop, and Lucas decided to approach him, but suddenly the fish just went down.
Lucas swam as fast as he could to the edge, and crew with all his strength “fish” “fish” over and over, and after a few roars towards the deep water, he realized that he got so close to the edge he had gone past it, and began going down and further, a few meters.
The second he understood what he had done he swam back, and held the first rock he came across, and waited.
What for, he didn’t know, but after a couple of moments the fish appeared.
Did you call me?
Yes.
How can I assist dear fish?
I’d like to ask you a question.
Ask away.
Okay: you swam over from a certain place, that I know of as well, so it’s likely you come from my area, I assume you’re in the same journey as I am, and many people escorted you to the door before you went out, they gave me a present, a bag with advice, thoughts, that I should take with me on my way, and use them.
Now, after so much swimming I arrived here, and saw the deep waters, and the fact that here end the place I know, I thought about going down there, but I wasn’t sure of myself, and I find myself being afraid.
So I went straight to the bag, and it does say there that many people never came back, and didn’t make it, that from the shame they could not come back home, and those who did remained alone.
I’ve heard enough of people who didn’t make it, and pay the price to this very day, lost all that they had.
And I thought to myself:
I’ve never done anything like this in my life, other have failed, why should I do better?
All this pressure, this headache, who needs it.
I’m not built for this, I need to swim peacefully and with no worries, let other people rack their brains.
I don’t have the experience that these water demand. I’ve got reference too, a piece of paper in my bag that says I don’t.
While thinking these things you swim towards me, pass me, look around and even stop, and then at once you start swimming towards that unknown place, aren’t you afraid?
My question is – what were you thinking when you stopped, and then pushed on?

What was I thinking?
What’s to think about?
That this is my journey, and my experience, and this is my life, and where I put the limits and choose to stop, that’s where I stop, and I don’t want to stop yet.
I don’t want to ever stop, for when I do, I’m not really alive.
They brought me a gift bag as well.

It was heavy, so I took out a lot of things, what good would water bottles do me, I’m in the ocean, and what good will motor oil do to me – I’ve no car.
There are many things I got from them, but I only need a few of them, the fact that one guy, years ago, was hiking in the desert, and got stranded without water, or a man that his engine died on him, and crossed the country from side to side on foot – that doesn’t help me, maybe it would help me.
But the only thing that it gives me is extra weight, so if I wanted to reach here I know I would have to let go of certain things.

What are the things, that should you part from them everything would like different?
What are the things, that should you part from them today the way would look easier?
What are the things, that should you part from them today, your life would be different, and more to your liking?

As a matter of fact, there are many things, but I don’t know how to part from them?
Then maybe you think and ponder on the wrong dilemmas and problem, instead of focusing on the why? Ask how? Instead of dealing with going down or not, and what people think and say, will think and will say, deal with how you can part from all these things that are in your way, with what you will know of yourself, and what you think of yourself,

“Live your life as you would like the man you see when you look at the mirror to be”

When you look at the mirror today who do you see?
Who would you really want to see when you look in the mirror?
Be that same person from today!