 |
Ten Most Surprising Questions for a New Father
Author: Paul Banas  | Posted: 21-05-2008 | Views: 2 | Rating: (171)  (?) 
Despite all the reading and preparation, nothing can quite prepare you for the feelings you'll have during the first few weeks after delivery. Here are some of the emotions many new fathers feel:
What is this feeling I have for this baby? Is it love?
Up to now, you've known romantic love or love for a parent or sibling. Nothing is the same, though, as the love you feel for this part of you that is now your responsibility.
Why don't I feel about the baby the way my wife does?
While you may have these strong protective feelings toward your new baby, you may not understand why you don't seem to bond the same way mom does. Don't worry; dads develop a relationship with babies at their own pace, and the type of daddy-child bond you are imaging will develop over the next few years, and usually not immediately.
Why do I feel jealous about a ten-pound baby?
Not me! I'd never be jealous of a little baby. You may be surprised though when you get very few of the kisses and your wife no longer has time to make you feel special. This is a shock to many dads and a potential source of stress if you're not aware of it.
Why do I feel depressed? What have I done? How did I get here? When will it end?
After the baby comes home, the flowers and gifts quit coming and the extra help has left, it's normal to have a reaction to the setting in of a new reality. You're not getting enough sleep and facing an endless rhythm of diapers and feeding, and meanwhile you're back at work, wondering how you'll ever keep up.
Am I really meant to be a dad? Was this a complete mistake?
It's completely natural to stare at your new baby and wonder I you'll be the dad you want to be, if you feel strongly enough to be the person you want to be.
Why I am so on edge? Is it fear?
Of course, it's fear. Until this moment, you only had to really worry about yourself since your wife can most likely take care of herself.
Now you have to face up to many fears at the same time. Will you be a good enough father? Can you protect your child from all the dangers, real and imagined, in the world? Do you have enough financial security? Will you always be here for him or her? This is perfectly normal and part of the transition to becoming a dad.
Will I still love my wife now that she's a mom?
Your wife may be a few pounds heavier now. Sex might not be something she's interested in anymore, at least for now. She might even strangely remind you of your own mother. For some men, their feelings about their spouse intensify during pregnancy, but for others, it's a shock. It reminds them they are no longer young or free to do as they choose, and that can itself be very frightening. There is no good answer here except that you have to come to terms with your new role as a partner and provider.
Having a baby, in the best of situations, is a decision you make because you're ready for the major changes it entails. If you're having a baby in less than perfect circumstances (it's unexpected), this doesn't change your responsibility once you've decided to have the baby together.
Most couples find that after kids they have to reestablish the intimacy they had before the baby. Many do this through planned "date nights" or eventually, even weekends away. You'll find that you will have to schedule time to be together to keep a real relationship going.
Why doesn't the baby like me?
First of all, little babies don't give a lot of feedback to anything, so don't sweat it. Pretty soon, though, you'll be getting a nod and a smile. You'll have to keep your expectations low however. The first few years are really about mommy. But don’t worry, if you're there early on, you'll have a very strong relationship to build from when this time changes.
Are we becoming our parents?
Join the club – very soon, you'll find yourself an hour into a discussion about strollers, diapers, feedings, and bottles and wonder to yourself what happened. Didn't you agree with your wife that you would never become one of "those people"? It's hard to avoid these topics since the baby and his needs are going to be running your life for at least the next three to four years.
Does it have to be so complicated?
It's usually the dad who wonders why mom has to have everything on a list, everything in its place, and everything on a schedule. That's why dads get a lot of teasing for arriving at the playground without extra formula or diapers. With a little practice, though, dads get the hang of what's really important. It doesn't need to be complicated but you do have to prepare for feedings and diapering or you're in big trouble. Keep those two things always in mind and most of the rest will usually follow.
Rate this Article:
Current: 0 / 5 stars - 0 vote(s).
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/parenting-articles/ten-most-surprising-questions-for-a-new-father-421233.html
About the Author:Paul Banas was looking for a business idea that would allow him the flexibility to spend time with his family. Paul Banas is a founder of GreatDad.com - a leading source of experience, recommendations, inspiration and advice for dads - delivered from the male perspective.
|
Submitting articles has become one of the most popular means of generating quality backlinks and targeted traffic to your website. Join us today - It's Free! |
|
Related Articles
Congratulations on your New Baby!
By: Paul Banas | 14/06/2007 | Parenting
Advice for Expectant Dads, New Dads, Single Dads, Stay at Home Dads with Parenting Information and Pregnancy Care.
Astronomy for 4-10 Yrs Kids
By: Paul Banas | 04/07/2007 | Parenting
Parenting tips for Expectant Dads, New Dads, Single Dads, and Stay at Home Dads for Pregnancy Care, Child Care, Baby Care and Parenting. Provides advice and recommendations on planning a baby, expectant fathers, raising kids, boys, girls, and teens.
Why Do Kids Lie
By: Paul Banas | 09/07/2007 | Parenting
Parenting tips for Expectant Dads, New Dads, Single Dads, and Stay at Home Dads for Pregnancy Care, Child Care, Baby Care and Parenting.
Dad Advice: Traumatic Birth
By: Paul Banas | 13/07/2007 | Parenting
Pregnancy tips for Expectant Dads, New Dads, Single Dads, and Stay at Home Dads for Pregnancy Care, Child Care, Baby Care and Parenting.
How to Potty Train your Child in One Day
By: Dr. Preston Smith | 19/07/2007 | Parenting
Parenting tips for Expectant Dads, New Dads, Single Dads, and Stay at Home Dads for Pregnancy Care, Child Care, Baby Care and Parenting.
Eight Tips for Dads Working From Home
By: Paul Banas | 03/08/2007 | Home Business
Parenting tips and advice for expectant dads, new dads, single dads and stay at home dads. Source of experience, recommendations, inspiration and advice for dads—delivered from the male perspective.
Divorced Dads – Dealing With a Broken Home
By: Paul Banas | 14/08/2007 | Divorce
Parenting tips and advice for expectant dads, new dads, single dads and stay at home dads. Source of experience, recommendations, inspiration and advice for dads—delivered from the male perspective.
Keeping Toddlers at Play
By: Paul Banas | 12/09/2007 | Parenting
Features advice from experienced dads on parenting, dad care, pregnancy care, adoption, child care, and on raising kids and teens.
Got a Question? Ask.
Ask the community a question about this article:
Frequently Asked Questions
With inflation eating into every pocket and ...
By: arllyn | 11-07-2008
With inflation eating into every pocket and Crude oil prices surging ... What should India look forward to?
James solomon rape trial
By: Silver | 10-07-2008
james solomon rape trial
Platforms By Demonia In New York City?
By: Eric Carr | 08-07-2008
I really need to know this, I was told there was a shoe store that sold Blatform boots By Demonia in New York City I believe it was in the 50's as the street, but I dont remember, Please PLEASE HELP!
1993 Seward Park Hs Violence
By: FeLiX FaMiLy | 05-07-2008
In 1993 on the first day of returning to school, a student cut another students throat with a box cutter I am trying to find out the names of the 2 students. Can you help me??
Jim Milam's murder, Waller Co or Fort Bend Co TX
By: undercoverjrt | 05-07-2008
looking for info on James (jim) Milam's murder in Waller Co or Fort Bend Co, TX. I believe it was in 1986..............his wife Vicki Milam was convicted of the murder. Jim was a retired fireman and cutting horse owner. They owned a place in Cat Springs, TX
What Happened to the Bicycle Rider?
By: Debbie | 03-07-2008
THere was an accident on MB Blvd and Pacific in Manhattan Beach where a bicyclist was ran over by a car backing out of a driveway on July 1. Can you tell me more? Did the injured bicycle guy make it?
Q&A Powered by: 
Latest Parenting Articles
Parenting Tips for Potty Training
By: Chris Lowrey | 25/07/2008
Potty training is an obvious necessity but it doesn't have to be stressful. Here are some quick and easy training techniques that are for both parent and child.
Parents and Children Can Spark Amazing Conversations About the Moon
By: Chris Lowrey | 25/07/2008
A perfect setting for a Parent and Child bonding moment can be looking at the Moon. The sky is an amazing place and with the curiosity of children, parents can take advantage of this opportunity to both educate and bond with their children.
When Grandma is Going to Die: What to Tell the Children
By: Kalman Heller | 25/07/2008
In recent weeks two mothers asked for advice on assisting their children through the impending deaths of a grandparent. The children ranged in age from 3 to 9. This is one of the most difficult issues for parents to deal with because of the combination of our culture's discomfort with...
When Grandma Dies
By: Kalman Heller | 25/07/2008
Explaining death involves two issues. What is it, literally, and what happens to the person when she dies. The former question is best answered in a simple and honest manner - grandma's heart had grown too weak to enable her to breathe, to see, think, or walk. With young children...
Are You Pregnant and Tired of Looking Tired?
By: Tabatha Jones | 24/07/2008
When I was pregnant I would always get the "are you feeling ok?" question or the "you look really tired," comment. Looking your best is important, but it can be hard when you have dark circles and puffiness under your eyes. Since your eyes are one of the first things people see when they look at you it is important that you address this problem.
To wake up your eyes, try these simple tips:
Choosing Your Childs First Bed
By: Laura Davis | 24/07/2008
There is no specific age that a child becomes ready to make the transition from crib to proper bed; many people estimate from around 1.5 years up to 3 years, however whenever you choose to buy your child their first bed is entirely up to you and when you feel your child is ready.
My Spy Cam | A Nanny Cam, For a Secure Future of Your Kids
By: Donald Carmin | 24/07/2008
Things around us and the world that we live in are not safe anymore. Switch on your television and you will be wonderstruck at the increasing number of stories that are making it difficult to entrust your child to a nanny. Every child can face neglect and abuse in the...
My Spy Cam | Wireless Spy Cams- Light and Handy Cameras
By: Donald Carmin | 24/07/2008
Many among us have to entrust our babies in hands of a nanny as we have work to attend to then we as parents constantly worry as to if the babies are safe. As an employer if your worry is that your employees are up to no good when you...
More from Paul Banas
Top 5 Signs of Pregnancy
By: Paul Banas | 23/07/2008 | Pregnancy
Pregnancy can be a puzzling time for the newly expectant dad. As your spouse experiences a hormonal rollercoaster, her body is likely to undergo some very surprising changes. Read this article to know basic signs of pregnancy.
Teaching My Baby Sign Language
By: Paul Banas | 21/07/2008 | Babies
Do you think that your baby is too young for you to enjoy interacting with him? Think again. There is a lot you can do, using baby sign language, that will be fun for both of you.
Top 7 Parenting Mistakes to Avoid
By: Paul Banas | 18/07/2008 | Parenting
If you have difficulty dealing with your children, some parenting styles definitely do not work. Read on to learn how you can avoid the most common parenting mistakes.
Best 5 American Cities to Bring Up Your Kids
By: Paul Banas | 16/07/2008 | Parenting
For dads, raising well-behaved kids is one of the most exasperating of parenting problems. Find list of the five best cities to raise your kids in America.
Interactive Pregnancy Calendar
By: Paul Banas | 15/07/2008 | Pregnancy
Interactive Pregnancy Calendar to prepare you on what to expect from your spouse and how best to help her mysterious period with Guide to Three Trimester of Pregnancy.
Dad's Guide to Getting Your Baby to Sleep
By: Paul Banas | 04/07/2008 | Babies
For some parents especially dads, getting their children to sleep is no problem at all. For others, it invariably involves a major struggle. Here are some easy tips on putting your kids to bed.
Information on Spider Veins or Varicose Veins
By: Paul Banas | 27/06/2008 | Wellness
Varicose veins are commonly found on the backs of the calves or on the inside of the leg Spider veins are similar to varicose veins, but they are smaller. Read article to know more about spider veins and varicose veins symptoms and treatments.
Top 4 Tips on Setting Up a Baby Room
By: Paul Banas | 26/06/2008 | Babies
Your child's room is special to him. As a dad, you can decorate your kid's room based on a theme of his interest, such as a 'cowboy' or 'jungle'. Read more about using themes to decorate your kid's room.
|
|
Home and Family 
