How can you tell if someone is lying? You can't, say some scientists - at least not with any consistency. That is what their research shows anyhow. But the research done in this area is often flawed in several important ways. Here are a couple of these flaws.
Lying In A Lab Is Not The Same
"People are very good liars when nothing is at stake," says Aldert Vrij of the University of Portsmouth in England. "But a lab setting is not real life." He is referring to the fact that most experiments on lie-detection have researchers telling subjects when to lie. The lies told have no real effect on subject's lives - there are no meaningful rewards or punishments involved.
Vrij sought to correct this deficiency in the research by looking at real-life police interrogation videos. This made for more relevant research, he figured. After all, we don't really care if we can or can't detect "pretend lies" in a laboratory. What we want is the ability to detect lies in real life.
Vrij concentrated on cases where the true facts were later determined. This way, he knew when the subjects were lying or telling the truth. What did he find? He found that there were fairly reliable clues to whether a person is lying, but that these are not universal. They are individual indicators.
One person might, for example, consistently avert his gaze when lying, while another might have greater eye-contact when lying. Since most research doesn't test for these individual factors, the results seem to indicate that lie-detecting isn't viable. In reality, a person who takes into account the individuals habits and patterns of behavior can detect lies better.
Researchers Ignore Lie Detection Examples
Often researchers ignore real-life examples of lie detection skills. Some people do have the ability to detect lies with consistency.
Maureen O'Sullivan of the University of San Francisco, in many studies of federal agents, forensic psychologists, and other groups of professionals, has found that a small percentage can consistently detect lying with 80% accuracy or higher. Out of 13,000 people she tested, only 15 consistently performed at this level, but the very fact that some can do this well suggests that there are things we can learn to improve our own lie-detecting abilities.
Keep in mind that although this is a small number of people who detect lies, they do it consistently. That means that they aren't just getting lucky. Also, they were able to do this with strangers who they knew nothing about. How many more people would be able to detect lies if they could first observe the liars and learn a little about them?
Can you tell if someone is lying? Why not ignore the flawed research of overly-skeptical scientists, and find out for yourself?
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By: Angry Mom | 20-08-2008
My in-laws have been lying about our 8 month old son and calling him names. They have made several claims about how far behind he is (he's actually ahead for his age, but they wanted him to be walking and talking by now) and call him an animal. They have been telling the rest of the family lies about my husband and me since shortly before our wedding. My mother-in-law even told her family that we cancelled our wedding! I want my husband to defend us, but he says that the real problem is his mother and that demanding that she stop would be too upsetting for her. What about our son? Doesn't he deserve to be treated with love and respect? She doesn't like it when my husband or I hold our son while we are talking to her. She keeps saying, "can't you put him down? Just lay him on the floor." She claims that we change his diaper too often and that the new diapers are so good that they need not be changed more than once per day. We also feed him too often and hold him too much. She keeps saying that I need to leave him in his play yard during visits so he doesn't bother anyone. She said that now is the time when we should be taking the opportunity to do odd things to our son, because he'll fight back when he gets older. She even announced at a family gathering that she hates babies. My husband and others used to try to get her to hold our son, but she would hold him at arms length then complain that he was a "bad baby" for crying. She still likes to tell people that he is the most unhappy baby she has ever seen. I can't blame him for crying around her. I feel like crying, too.
The family blames her behavior on a psychological problem, but she often admits that she is lying and laughs about it. If she really does have a psychological problem, why doesn't her husband get her help? If she knows what she is doing, why does everyone baby her? If the whole family supposedly knows she isn't to be trusted, why do they believe her? If someone mentions that she has problems, my father-in-law denies it, and yet to explain away her behavior, he claims she can't help herself. My father-in-law defends her "right" to say and do whatever she pleases to whomever she chooses. I become intensely angry at even the thought of certain things she has done. I want to protect my son. It goes against my personal beliefs to keep him from my husband's family, but I don't know what else to do. I don't understand how her husband can be so loyal when she has cheated on him so often. She has even been fired from jobs for having sex at work and sexual harassment where she could have been charged with sexual assault, yet he fervently stands by her. She used to lock my husband out of their home when he was only 3 - 5 years old so she could entertain one of the neighbors and would make him strip before entering their home when he got a little older, yet he also defends her. She claims to have been abducted by aliens and also claims to have chats with mischievous little ghosts, yet her whole family will blast anyone who suggests that those situations are unlikely. She looks through other people's trash and makes presents of whatever she finds. She publicly humiliated my sister-in-law's ex-husband by announcing at a club that they all belong to that he is gay. Years later she still harasses his family whenever she can. She claims to have all sorts of illnesses and diseases, but doesn't show any symptoms unless she takes medication that makes her ill because she shouldn't be taking it. This is turning into more of a rant. My problem is that I don't know how to protect my son without making my husband hate me. If he isn't willing to protect his own son, then maybe I shouldn't care. What keeps me up at night is this - what if he divorces me, then I would have no say in where my son goes or who he's left alone with. I need ideas for the best course of action. By the way, it may not seem like it at this moment, but I do love my husband and the divorce idea is only something I fear, not that I wish to initiate.
Does lying cause cancer
By: finman1959@aol.com | 20-07-2008
do you think lying could cause cancer ?
Is it ok to drug test a boyfriend?
By: sweetcheekzz1387 | 22-05-2008
My boyfriend of 3 years and I currently live together. He however has a problem with lying. We had come to an agreement that he would stop smoking pot to better himself and once again he has lied and done it. I told him to leave and he begged and begged and said to give him one more chance. I am giving him one more chance and hes going away this weekend with his unsupportive friends who dont want him to quit. I am making him take a drug test when he gets home to see if he is still doing it, if so he gets kicked out. Is that wrong of me as a girlfriend to make him take it?
What should I think about the things I have found out about my BF?
By: anne243 | 23-04-2008
I dont know how to feel about mt relationship. I have been with a guy for about 1 year now. He always tells me how much he loves me and talks about our futuer a lot. I love this about him but I have found out some things that make me think he might not feel for me the way he tells me he does. when we first started dating I found an email of his to a different girl that was a lie. it was as if he was telling her the things he needed to to keep her in contact with him. then there was some photos that I found. lots of photos of other girls, naked pic of him self that he had sent to other girls, and I even saw some pics (naked in the tub) of the girl that he told me was his best friends wife! and then there was the ex girl friend who he called even tho he knew that I would not like it. all of the things I said ( with the exception of the ex thing) happen before I knew him. but I feel like those are all things that tell me about his personality. I admit that I looked at his photos with out him knowing. but that was only after I found some of this sfutt out just by puting things away or trying to go on line to look at my mail. so know I don't know how to feel. should I say the past is the past? should I tell him I have seen the pic and hear some lame excuse? should this be a red flag for me?
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