Across the miles – the long distance romance

Love can come into our lives in ways we never expect. Thousands of hopeless romantics change their lives everyday to pursue long distance love. But, to coin a phrase, absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Long distance romances can work and can actually have advantages over same-city romances. People who are in a relationship that's separated by miles appreciate the time they have together more. It's about quality time, not quantity time. They take more care into making each meeting special (and need we mention the physical anticipation and sexual tension!).

Yet, there are a lot of obstacles long distance couples face. In an article called Making Long Distance Relationships Work, the publisher, Joe Tracy, says long distances lovers should invest in setting up some ground rules.

Writes Tracy: "Recent research carried out by Dr. Greg Guldner regarding long distance relationships discovered that 70% of men and women who failed to set rules and routine ended their long distance romances within 5 months. The study concluded that in order for these types of relationships to go the distance it is crucial to establish and agree on certain rules. Setting strict boundaries including not to date other people, to communicate at least every second day, and to take realistic measures to see each other at least every 8-12 weeks".

Another huge and obvious concern is the long-term future of such a romance. If you are at the point where another same-city couple would start to talk about sharing an apartment or marriage, what do you do if you're living in different towns?

Sometimes, this is a question to deal with just as soon as the relationship looks like it's getting serious. It often involves, ultimately, a sacrifice of one person moving towns, or perhaps, the couple moving to a new city all together, in the spirit of compromise. But this is often easier said than done due to working life – and it's often our jobs that are dictating which city we live in.

Once you're under the same ceiling of stars, the dynamics of the relationship can change dramatically. Like everything in relationships, the importance of communication is immense. If you've been long distance lovers for a while, chances are your communication skills have, by necessity, flourished. Use this and talk things through and have contingency plans for every scenario.

For long distance lovers, a surprise visit can be a wonderful boost to the relationship. There are few things better than spontaneity in a relationship. But if you think you'll catch your lover with another…then maybe long distance loving isn’t for you. You have to deeply trust the other person.

With the internet beaming into every household across the world that has an internet connection, it is very common for online dating sites to be pairing up the most unlikely couples. Singles chat rooms are another way both long distance and interracial bonds are being formed. Chat rooms, web cams and instant messaging can also be credited for maintaining communication between long distance lovers in between real life visits.

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