It's a happens more times than you would think! You're out and about running an errand, minding your own business and you bump into a friends husband and he's with someone he's not suppose to be with. Initially he doesn't see you, but you stand and you watch and you observe that the woman that he's with is clearly more than a friend. Your friends husband is having an affair and you are left wondering what you should do next.
Your thoughts are, as you sit down with another friend later that evening with your own husband, you tell him this: "I saw her husband cheating, should I tell her?"
Your husband warns you against saying anything, but the reasons that he lists are valid, but still your dilemma prevails and you don't know what to do for the best.
Here's some of what your husband might have said to you:
"I Saw Her Husband Cheating" - Shooting the Messenger
Telling the unsuspecting wife means you could end up having both barrels blasted at you from a wife who is not ready to face what her spouse is up. She might have built herself a safe little emotional cubby hole where she goes and hides out from the reality of her life. Anyone who attempts to blast her out of that cubby hole, into the reality of what is actually going on, is going to get it!
Plus, ask yourself this, is she going to believe what you're saying to her? Again denial is a powerful tool when you're in a desperate place.
"I Saw Her Husband Cheating" - Are You Ready For the Mayhem?
If you do tell her and she confronts him with what she's discover, you're pretty much guaranteed to have your name thrown around in the ensuing mayhem.
Again, you could end up being the bad guy that the two of them unite against and turn their anger and range onto. So before you go jumping in doing 'the right thing' ask yourself if you're ready to be the fall guy for their woes.
"I Saw Her Husband Cheating" - But it's Not My Business
Many people faced with what to do after witnessing something they shouldn't have, take the stance that it isn't their business and they're not getting involved. Which is completely understandable given what could happen if you tell the unsuspecting wife.
If you decide that you'd rather stay out of it don't beat yourself up and feel guilty about your decision. You are not responsible for anyone else's choices or decisions.
"I Saw Her Husband Cheating" - Should I Have a Quiet Word With Him?
For many this is the solution that a lot of people will opt for. Having a private word with the cheating husband to warn him that you know and that he better fix up and either end the affair or tell his wife, is not a bad strategy to opt for.
It removes you from the full on fire and wrath of the wife, but talking to the cheating husband also makes you feel that you have actually done something!
Whatever you decide to do in a dilemma such as this, make sure that you think really clearly, long and hard before you decide to do what you consider 'the right thing!' What you saw or think you saw, might suddenly not be so black and white!
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