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Love is Trusting & Understanding
Author: Roger Ali Bocus  | Posted: 06-05-2007 | Comments: 0 | Views: 60 | Rating: (78)  (?) 
 LOVE IS UNDERSTANDING
Steve and Joan (husband and wife) were both on their way home from church after a Sunday morning service, when Joan upon seeing one of her male fellow employees – waved to him. This simple acknowledgement however, incited an unfavorable response from her husband, Steve.
“Don’t you ever do that again, eh!” Steve annoyingly said.
“Don’t do what?” Joan innocently rejoined.
“Don’t you ever wave again to any man while I am in this car, eh!”
Oh boy! As you can well imagine, this conversation was followed with anger, argument and a pin-drop silence.
Doesn’t this sound like a familiar scene to you?
Hey! Before you were married, both you and your wife had male/female friends. To expect each other to have to give up, or not relate to almost all friends of the opposite sex is: Totally unreasonable, unrealistic and immature.
Isn’t it about time we grow up?
Jealously my friend is evidence of insecurity – Fear of losing someone whom you claim to love – To another.
Jealously shuts the door in the face of ‘Intimacy’. It will encourage your loved one to feel afraid to share everything with you, because if they were to share certain things with you – You would respond with anger and jealously.
There is no need for you to be constantly checking up on your partner, every hour on the hour.
So you have made a call at home or at work, and the phone is either busy or keeps on ringing unanswered. Immediately all sorts of crazy thoughts begin to race through the insecure mind. Especially, if you have been calling every five minutes for half an hour straight and the line is busy still.
When you get through to the person now, you begin to pose to the individual subtle questions of insecurity under the guise of genuine concern - Trying to find out who they were with on the phone for so long.
Distraught over who she might be speaking to or socializing with, when you are not around – Uncertain about the unknown. Feeling threatened by every male friend she may speak cordially to.
Who do you think you are fooling? With whom do you believe the problem really lies?
Man, know thyself!
Do you feel that by keeping tabs on your wife like this (isolating her also from her friends and family) – You can keep her all to yourself? Then you are wrong, sir. You will cause her to become more emotionally distant from you – Eventually losing her.
Living like this is a real mental torment. Relax, and learn to exercise TRUST.
It’s practically impossible for you to watch someone for 24 hrs. straight: Everyday.
If you have been treating your partner exceptionally good, then there is no need for you to worry about him/her being unfaithful to you.
Love does not worry: Love Trusts.
Insecurity promotes domination, selfishness, manipulation, possessiveness and control.
Sir, don’t you know that relationships are like eggs – very fragile. If you try to hold on to it too tightly, you can crush it – Destroy it.
The gentle touch is what it takes, with just enough hold to keep and protect it.
Some years ago, I remember, there was a particular husband who was so insecure that he would be secretly going through his wife’s purse and mails. Literally questioning her every phone call – Suspicious of her every move. This guy was paranoid with insecurity.
Sir/Madam, if any of this behavior falls in your garden: Seek Help!
Anyone would want to run away from a person like this.
Exercise Trust
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Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/love-is-trusting-understanding-143170.html
About the Author:Roger Ali Bocus is the author of ten (10) books, a counselor and motivational speaker. Roger is also the President of The Literary Crusaders: A non-profit organisation whose mission is to effect positive and lasting change in the lives of people, worldwide, through the written word.
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