Stephany Alexander is a relationship expert and CEO/Founder of WomanSavers.com - The World's Largest Database Rating Men. She holds a degree in Communications and is the author of the book "Sex, Lies and the Internet."
Cheating boyfriends leave many signs and with a little patience, and by giving him lots of time and space to cheat, you can catch your cheating boyfriend without having to hire a costly private investigator. We have compiled a list of the top 5 signs of a cheating boyfriend so you can tell whether or not your boyfriend is cheating. Remember to pay attention to details and follow your gut instinct. In addition, if you and your boyfriend haven’t clearly discussed whether the two of you are both monogamous in your relationship, don’t assume he has just “automatically” decided to be faithful to only you. Maybe in your cheating boyfriend’s mind, your relationship isn’t serious enough for him to consider being faithful yet. Make sure you are both clear on where you stand regarding fidelity in your relationship.
1. Lack of intimacy. This doesn’t always have to be in the form of sex. It can be a decline of touching, cuddling, holding hands or kissing.
2. He cheated on his old girlfriends. If you can talk to some of his old girlfriends, by all means, do it. However, make sure to ask his ex-girlfriends in a kind and calm manner so they do not become defensive. A cheating boyfriend will usually repeat their behavior with their next girlfriend.
3. He avoids you. A big sign of a cheating boyfriend is when he makes up all sorts of excuses as to why he can’t be with you because he’s spending time with his “other” girlfriend. If he has to work late, stay after school, is always with his friend’s or co-workers more than usual, these could be the excuses your boyfriend is using to cover up his cheating ways.
4. He never answers his cell phone around you. A way to tell if your boyfriend is cheating is if he always turns his ringer off around you or walks out of hearing distance from you. These are big red flags he may be cheating. If he receives calls at odd hours or speaks on the phone in a strange manner could also be signs he is cheating.
5. He is irritable or criticizes you more. If your boyfriend’s behavior suddenly changes, there is a possibility that he may be finding fault with you in order to justify his cheating in his mind. That way your cheating boyfriend can say you “drove” him away because of your supposed faults. The opposite of this behavior is being overly nice, giving gifts and being lovey-dovey because he wants to keep his cake (you) and eat it too (his other girlfriend).
If you discover your boyfriend is cheating, seek support from those around you like friends and family. Don’t get revenge by sleeping with one of his friends because it just brings you down to his low level and you should strive to be the bigger person. The circumstances of your boyfriend’s cheating will allow you to decide whether to leave or stay. It is very therapeutic to write down your anger, sadness and disappointment in the form of a letter or a cheating boyfriend poem. Allow yourself some grieving time and then get right back into the game of life by filling your life with activities that interest you.
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