Who Makes The First Move?

If you've been in the dating scene for some time, you've probably felt attracted to certain men in places such as bars, cafes, and restaurants. This is normal - after all, these places are typically where well-dressed, well-mannered men hang out. It's impossible not to be attracted to at least some of the men who spend their spare time here.

But have you ever shared an attraction with a man in the scene? By shared, I mean you have the same attraction you've felt for other men towards him - but, at the same time, he's giving clues that he thinks you're not bad, yourself. He may be glancing over at you, or seems to be smiling more ever since you walked into his field of vision.

This is great news - powerful, mutual attraction is also known to most people (even the scientists) as chemistry. And they know for a fact that chemistry is the foundation of the healthiest, happiest, longest-lasting relationships out there. And it doesn't come often - you're lucky to come across it even once, so when it happens to you, it's important to actually do something!

Unfortunately, many great women don't do anything to capitalize on this rare opportunity. These same women hesitate to make the first move primarily due to social misconceptions. For instance, they think society sees women who make the first move (e.g. initiate a conversation or establish a connection with a man) is either "aggressive" or "domineering," or both. Other women prefer to just sit around and look pretty, waiting with high hopes for the man to get up and make the first move.

Sadly, these same women almost always watch the time tick by, until the man ultimately gets up and leaves the scene without making any moves. These women missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime - just because they were scared that the man would be turned off.

Well, news flash - it doesn't turn men off. The best men out there are confident and easygoing, and wouldn't mind having a woman do some of the work and make the first move.

These deadly social misconceptions are more prevalent in more traditional societies, and may even prevail over more contemporary settings as well.

Next time you feel that you're sharing a powerful attraction with someone across the room, do yourself a favor. Excuse yourself for a few minutes and make your way to the bar, the counter, or the balcony for some air. Give him a quick glance, a smile, or even a wink if you'd like to push your luck, on your way there.

If he takes the bait, he'll soon be at your side, giving you his name and asking for yours. It won't be long until you know how to get in touch with each other. Who knows? He could actually be "the one," and you'll forever be thankful to yourself for taking the risk of making the first move.

Wouldn't that be a lot better than wondering what might have been?