Living Through Death and Depression

Death is perhaps the only thing no human being willfully thinks about. The only reason we think about death is when we attend a funeral, mourn a loved one, or if we ourselves have to face death. Death is part of human experience and is considered by some to be a rite of passage to the life beyond. Many fear death due to its utter mystery and elusiveness. As a subject, it is very difficult to study, measure, and understand since death belongs to the metaphysical realm. It is an enigma that can only be explained only by those who have passed through it. And how can those who have passed onto the state of death return to explain its mysteries to the living? Still, we believe that these explanations can be heard only when we too pass through the gates of death.

In biology, death is defined as “the state of a thermodynamic system in which it cannot organize autonomously the energy from the environment.” For Buddhists, death is but part of an eternal “stream” of consciousness. Death is merely an inescapable part of human suffering. Death is very central to Buddhism because it is said that it is what prompted Gautama Buddha to ponder about the futility of life and material possessions.

Like Buddhism, Hinduism teaches that death is a process that is as natural as the earth, sun, sea, and the sky. Hindu beliefs also focus on the certainty of reincarnation, a process where a human being is reborn over and over again.

For Christianity, death is seen as a passage to the eternal blessings of God and an entrance to the pearly gates of heaven --- but only for true believers. While death is expected to cause sorrow, Christian doctrine teaches that the faithful should also rejoice in the certainty of salvation for true believers.

Regardless of faith or philosophy, death is universally seen as a cause for grief and depression. It is the one thing that bounds all human beings together. The grave is where all human beings are headed, regardless of nationality, faith, culture, and belief.

Based on decades of research and observation, people undergo five stages of mourning. The first step is denial and isolation. This stage is where a person denies the death of the loved one. The denial is actually a form of defense against the negative information or the stressful situation that is faced by a person who has lost a loved one. After the initial denial wears off, a person is overcome by anger. The intense emotion elicited by the death of a loved one causes a person to react in anger. In the bargaining stage, a person delves into past actions or inactions that could have caused the death of the loved one. At the stage of depression, a person slowly realizes the tremendous loss and slips back to state of melancholy and emotional suffering. After a period of depression that can last from one month to several years, a grieving person slowly comes to terms with the loss and eventually reaches the stage of acceptance.

Some individuals who find it difficult to cope with the the loss of a loved one. The depression can be so debilitating that it can almost totally disrupt a person's sleep, eating patterns, and ability to work and relate with others. A person who cannot move on and overcome grief may need to undergo counseling. With the help of a counselor, a grieving person may be able to finally cope with the loss and regain the ability to live a normal life. Faith-based groups or church ministers are among the most sough-after counselors due to their training and ability to explain the religious or spiritual meaning behind death. These counselors are also able to provide spiritual guidance and instruction so that the person in grief can find renewed strength from religion or from a particular spiritual belief.