Spiritual Life Coaching

"What is the function of a spiritual life coach and what are some of the tasks and methods they use?" That is the question I was asked when I was interviewed recently for a television special on Executive and Spiritual Life Coaching

The answer to the first part of the question is as varied as there are spiritual coaches, but the theme each has in common is working "from", "with" and "in" a spiritual dimension, spirituality in this case understood as that which is both totally beyond us, but at the same time inextricably part of us.

Simply put, a spiritual life coach facilitates his/her clients' spiritual growth. This can run the gamut from people at the very beginning of a spiritual life to those well advanced on a spiritual Path. It also encompasses people in spiritual transition (e.g., people leaving and/or joining a particular faith tradition, people who have been abused spiritually/religiously and who now wish to reclaim a new, healthy spirituality while working through their pain, etc.).

The client establishes his/her "agenda" and the coach most often assists by listening and asking relevant questions. The coach and client then devise a plan for reaching the client's spiritual goals. The coach acts as cheerleader, mentor, accountability partner, and, what I like to refer to as, the client's Sacred Witness.

It is important to remember, however, that coaching is not therapy nor is it pastoral counseling. The relationship between coach and client is that of equals. The journey is a shared experience and the coach doesn't necessarily have to know more than the client.

Some coaches will give their clients "homework" such as journaling, keeping a "dream journal", and/or making lists of things that empower or hinder a person's spiritual growth based on what the coach knows about the client's goals. Clients are encouraged to list ten goals they wish to reach over the next ninety days.

In a large way, spiritual coaches help others to help themselves, to live empowered, responsible, joyful, grateful and peaceful lives. A spiritual coach is attempting to raise peoples' consciousness and disseminate the good news (gospel) that one person at a time we can turn the world around, as individuals, as couples, as families, as corporations, as governments, and countries, and as a planet. Together, coach and client take the spirit energy that is within each of us and begin using it as a tool of profound personal change or transformation, building and tending and nurturing the lives we want in our deepest hearts to have, lives as whole, integrated, peaceful, loving, truly happy people, that is, people who are in tune with spirit.

A spiritual life coach should work to empower and inspire people to, as Bishop John Shelby Spong aptly puts it, "Live fully; love wastefully; and be all you can." This, I believe, is the heart of Jesus' message along with many other spiritual Teachers throughout history (e.g., Mohammed, Buddha, Ghandi, King and Mother Teresa). This is something each of us has the power to do. The result being better citizens, better partners, better spouses, and better children. This is spirit in action.

As a coach, one seeks to keep oneself out of the way as much as possible in order to let the client find his/her own answers. The coach owes it to the client to insure that the time spent belongs to the client. Hence, many coaches find that having clients come to a session each week with an agenda is most helpful. The client's goals are of foremost importance to the coach, who must remain sensitive to whatever spiritual, religious, and/or denominational means the client wishes to use.

Spiritual coaching is like an emptying process (Greek: kenosis): coaches attempt to remain nonjudgmental. and in so doing are able to act as conduits or sounding boards with the clients' interests at heart as opposed to layering the coach's agenda on the client, thus hijacking his/her experience of finding truth for themselves. The client holds infinite wisdom, including the answers. It is often simply waiting to be retrieved, remembered or resurrected.

Is spiritual coaching religious? It certainly can be depending on the coach and the client. Traditional religions are followed by some coaches, but others do not follow any religion. Tolerance is a huge part of spiritual coaching. People should be met where they are and on what ever path they're walking. A spiritual coach should be flexible enough to work with a client from his/her personal philosophy, faith tradition, and spirituality. And a coach must certainly make extra room for the person who is not in touch with any spirituality, but is seeking one. People wake up spiritually at different times and for different reasons.

Think about the times in your life when you've had spiritual experiences. What were they like? What provoked them? How did they leave you feeling?

To summarize, then, a spiritual life coach works with clients in facilitating spiritual growth. By listening and asking relevant questions, the coach helps the client begin to find his/her way along a meaningful Path or conversely helps the more advanced client attain even greater spiritual depth. In a world that is becoming less and less certain, growing and maintaining a healthy spiritual life is of the utmost importance. When uncertain about life, many people become introverted, looking for a greater power than themselves. The coach must do all he/she can to understand what the client is going through and help the client work through the process. Learning to live comfortably with uncertainty is one of the primary lessons we must learn as incarnated souls.