Is Childishness a Social Problem?

You will acknowledge that immaturity does not do much damage. You will also be in agreement that it often makes some people quite sweet as long as they do not go beyond it. Of course it is quite charming most of the time, but only as long as it does not hinder with the individual’s point of view of reality, or come in a way of crisis solving and resolution making tasks that need to be handled with some degree of maturity.

You must come across the woman who refuses to wish a hearty farewell to her infancy. She wears pigtails and gorges on candy bars, adores soft toys and bursts into peals of high-pitched laughter at the slightest provocation. She just can’t resist being called lovable, mushy. She loves nicknames. She is quite cute, very cute. Sickeningly cute, some might go so far as to say. Why, oh why can’t some people just grow up? Take that 25 aged public relations executive with a respectable firm example. Her problem is that she just does not get taken seriously. “I hate it. Just because I joke and laugh and am always getting teased does not mean I am not a professional. Why don’t people judge me by the quality of my work rather than my personality?” she asks.

Unfortunately for her, she’s found out too late that her early childhood habit of frivolity has been silently working against her. “No matter what I do now, people still look upon me as a kid,” she complains. She believes she’s corrected the issue by toning down her hairstyle, losing the baby talk, and dressing more professionally. But perhaps she does not realize just how deep the habit has seeped into her system.” How do you sit down and a serious brainstorming session with someone who is always giggling and joking?” asks one of her colleagues. “It is so irritating. Besides, it certainly does not give clients a good impression. What is worse is the way her voice lowers into the childish tone when you get angry with her. Who does she think, she is fooling?”

But she finds it bewildering that her colleagues don’t think she’s interesting. After all, her boyfriend just loves her behavior, her mother adores it and so do all her friends. She’s been pampered and hugged and kissed silly. But it just won’t work in the office, and it’s getting difficult to play down what’s become a habit. A clinical psychologist explains that people who behave in a childish manner are fully aware of what they are doing, no matter what they might lead you to think. It’s merely an attention-getting device; they want you to notice them. But that, she explains, is one way of looking at it; the other being that the individual is falling into what is known as the “Peter Pan Syndrome” (for more, you may read ‘http://www.amazon.com/Peter-Pan-Syndrome-Never-Grown/dp/0396082181’), the “Peter Pan Syndrome” which happens when the individual is afraid of growing up.

“Childishness is a defense mechanism that people use to escape their responsibility, afraid of being blamed when something goes wrong and who are intrinsically insecure. It is that fear that drives a woman to act childish, hoping that someone else will take over.” For a teenager, passing into her mature years means a threatened loss of innocence. For someone who has cultivated the image of being cute and adorable, being protected and defended becomes a part of life. The clinical psychologist explains that when a woman fears losing the protection that she always had, and is faced with having to take decision, act responsible and mature, she sometimes resorts to pouts, tears and giggles. The transition not only means giving up the dependence, but it is difficult since it’s always easier to let someone else make decision and take responsibility for you; besides it also involves a sudden role reversal – till now you were protected and cared for, now you have to do it – and sometimes for others. Some men fail to understand that their wife’s childish behavior is in fact plea for attention. When she does not get it, she often buckles it and takes charge. He is on the other hand, can’t understand how this once immature, childish woman can take charge of her own life. Inside it all, the woman has been very mature and rational, while externally exhibiting signs of immaturity. However it is important to know that the whole childish act is not restricted to woman alone. “Have ever seen a guy show off his new car?”

A lot of guys behaving childishly in social situations and it is understood that it’s probably because they missed out on something when they were young, were too busy studying, or because of too much parental pressure. That’s why; men go ‘gaga’ over a new music system, a car, or a girlfriend. It’s like a toy they couldn’t enjoy when they were young.

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