Google Pagerank - a Guide for Virgins

Google PageRank is very much like penis size:

- Everyone thinks it's important.
- No one admits it's important (unless you've got a huge one).
- Everyone is interested in the size of everyone else's.

I started a small website earlier this year to investigate whether I could supplement my income. In researching website optimization, I came across PageRank size for the first time and was amazed about how many people obsessed about it. Obviously everyone wants a larger one and there are various methods of increasing it - some proven, some painful, and some downright silly.

But let me explain what PageRank is first.

PageRank is one of the many factors Google takes into account when it returns the results for a search term. It is, in effect, Google's evaluation of how important a site is. The main element in this is the number of sites linking to your site and their PageRank size. This can be viewed as a popularity contest with the sites with the bigger PageRanks getting bigger votes (ain't that always the way).

The upshot of this is that sites with, shall we say, less than a handful of PageRank cannot get close to the top of the results when popular keywords are searched upon, and have to rely on more specific keywords to get traffic from search engines.

PageRank is measured from 0-10. Sites can be out into three categories:

PageRank 0-2 - New websites that are just starting out. Websites that have come to terms with the size of their PageRank and have given up trying to increase it (but secretly hope it'll still grow over time). Bad boys who have broken the rules.

PageRank 3-6 - Established websites that have proven they can perform. Niche websites that have a big enough PageRank to do what they need it to do.

PageRank 7-10 - Some of these guys' PageRank is so big it'll knock you over if they turn to quickly in the communal showers. In order to compete with this PageRank, one needs to develop other techniques to establish your own area of specialist expertise.

In order to not get their PageRank laughed at in those showers, webmasters are constantly looking to increase it. Here are a few ways to stretch that PageRank.

Increase the Girth - By increasing the number of pages on the site, it increases the amount of PageRank the webmaster can play with. If those pages point internally then it can increase the PageRank of those pages for instance. As we all know, girth is a secondary factor when it comes to performance and you should be careful that you don't create pages with no real value or content, as one can be punished for that (and not in a nice way).

Expose Yourself - Advertising your website is a core piece of your strategy. However, to really increase that PageRank, you need incoming, permanent, links not occasional pay-per-click ads or banners that can change day-to-day or week-to-week. Ways to do this include, writing high quality articles that get published on a number of sites (the author is still working on getting that one right), being active in fora associated with the subject of your website, and forming a group in one or more of the social websites. You certainly shouldn't keep it in your pants, but over-exposure can be detrimental to your PageRank too, if you are deemed to be spamming.

Hire Some Prostitutes - There are some websites (the author is told) that will provide links to your website for a fee. Now, this is illegal in the United States of Google and there are severe penalties if you are caught. They rely on snitches to let them know it's happening, so this kind of activity tends to happen on street corners and undesirable neighborhoods on the web. This is not recommended.

"Don't Worry About It, It Happens to Everyone" - There is a small but vocal group that says you shouldn't worry about the size of it and just concentrate on providing good content for your visitors. This is the equivalent of "the size doesn't matter, it's what you do with it Honey", or a favorite of my ex-wife's - "more than a mouthful's a waste". The reality is that people visit your website because of what's on it, but they won't visit if they don't know it's there - so a balance is needed.

There are also a number of things you should avoid that may shrivel your PageRank.

Getting Caught With Your Pants Down - Anything that Google prohibits (and there is a lot) can adversely affect your PageRank if they catch you in the act. So keep your nose clean and make sure you understand the rules.

Orgies - Simply exchanging links with other sites doesn't really have an effect on your PageRank (although it still might generate traffic) and using "link farms" can have a negative effect. The author has never visited a "link farm" (to his knowledge) but imagines they are akin some sort of communal retreat for perverts, or like one of those swinging parties you never get invited to.

Flashing - Pop-ups are not actually banned but they are obviously unpopular. A number of directories are now banning sites that have excessive pop-ups, which will decrease the number of sites that will publish a link to your site if you do have lots of pop-ups.

In summary, PageRank is a very important aspect, but to obsess over it means you won't satisfy your visitors in other areas, which might be important to them. If it is that important to you, you need to get out and meet people!

If it's big enough to do the job, be happy.