Difficulty Reaching Orgasm During Sex

The website 'Go Ask Alice!' confirms that it is likely to be difficult for a woman to reach orgasm through intercourse since the clitoris is not located inside a woman's vagina. They suggest that women should aim to have their orgasm during other sexual activity either before or after intercourse.

Any woman who can climax with a partner either by using orgasm techniques from masturbation or through oral sex can at least enjoy orgasm during love-making. The problem occurs when a woman never learns how to orgasm with a partner because she does not succeed with applying orgasm techniques to sex.

The pre-orgasmic woman, who can only orgasm during masturbation, has to accept that she has her orgasm during time alone and that sex with a partner involves making the most of other aspects of physical intimacy.

Expectations for the modern couple's sex life

Sex with a partner can quite legitimately include activities other than sexual intercourse but ultimately most of us end up with a pattern for sex that includes intercourse or penetrative sex at some point.

"One thing that all words about sex have in common, the four-letter words, medical words and euphemisms, is that they include the idea of penetration of a vagina by a penis. You haven't really "made love" unless this has happened." (p36 Woman's Experience of Sex - 1983).

This may simply be because Nature intended that men should get the best possible sexual satisfaction from orgasm achieved by thrusting during penetrative sex. So the issue of female orgasm during intercourse is still important even if a woman can orgasm by other means.

What amazes me is that everyone understands immediately if a man questions lack of orgasm but my dilemma often meets with a complete lack of comprehension. Exactly what is your problem - other women aren't bothered so why should you be?

Unfortunately, a woman who is familiar with orgasm often doesn't see the point of sexual activity without her own orgasm.

"Most women want affection and closeness and they obtain great sexual enjoyment if their partner arouses them, by stimulating their erotic areas gently and seductively; but once a woman has experienced an orgasm, she wants that too." (p106 EveryMan 1980)

Jane Thomas: Author http://WaysWomenOrgasm.org and http://Nosper.com