Seeking Help For Premature Ejaculation?

"Apart from physical factors like spinal or prostrate gland ailments, a lot of the cases I deal with are stress-related thanks to the hectic lifestyle that people have today, so one of my jobs is to get my clients to relax," says Judie.

And thereby hangs a tale. Though medical science is yet to ascertain exactly why premature ejaculation occurs, it has often been found that psychological factors contribute in large measure to make a man ejaculate prematurely. As Judie says, "Most people commonly feel that while having sex, women are more emotionally involved than men, but I tell my clients that they shouldn't underestimate the importance of emotional intimacy in one's sexual life."

Therefore, temporary factors like depression, financial worries, performance anxiety, and low self-esteem may hamper emotional well being which in turn could contribute to premature ejaculation.

It took Kenneth Faraday, a 37-year-old financial analyst, five sessions with a sexual therapist to realize that he was allowing unresolved arguments and with his girlfriend and hurt feelings to prey on his mind when having sex with her, thus "distancing myself from her emotionally".

In something of a vicious cycle, says Judie, while performance anxiety can lead to premature ejaculation, the reverse keeps happening too. So the more anxious you are about your performance, the more likely you are to ejaculate prematurely.

Standard cures for premature ejaculation include practicing relaxation techniques such as breathing exercises and yoga. Medically speaking, a doctor may prescribe antidepressants such as paroxetine, fluoxetine, and sertraline.

Additionally, there are several local anesthetic creams like lidocaine and prilocaine that effectively reduce premature ejaculation. However, these affect a man's partner as well, because they reduce sensation on both the penis and the vagina.

Apart from these methods, yet another way to help you deal with premature ejaculation is the 'start-stop' technique. The basic idea is to get a man to maintain an erection for a longer period of time by 'starting and stopping' masturbation and then starting again.

Most commonly, sexual therapists recommend that a man obtain an erection through masturbation prior to having sex. Once he has an erection, he stops masturbating until he begins to lose it, and then begins all over again. Slowly, he will gain greater control over his reflexes and learn to control his ejaculation.

Says Judie: "It is best if the man's partner is also part of the process. That way, he has to exercise greater self-control because the temptation to climax is also greater." However, she also advises men not to be discouraged if they initially fail with the stop and start method.

"It is common for the first few attempts to fail miserably. I would say it would take at least a couple of weeks for someone to gain even partial control over premature ejaculation," she says. "But it always works in the end."

So for those seeking help for premature ejaculation, a brighter future is just a matter of time!