Rod Phillips is a sexual counselor and writer at The Best Guide to Sex Positions
Men! Your woman wants an orgasm - and though she may not want it each time you have sex, she certainly isn't going to be too happy if sex is limited to you getting off and then ignoring her needs. The best way to keep her happy is to make sure she's had her pleasure before you come, and there are several sexual positions which are more likely to make this happen.
So, without further ado, here's our suggested list of positions that will let her get the pleasure she craves, while making sure you don't miss out.
First of all, if you haven't tried the woman on top position, then check it out! Many women love being uppermost when it comes to making love - it's a position that allows them to move in the way that gives them the greatest pleasure, whether that's through clitoral stimulation or G spot stimulation. She can move around much more in this position, and because she's in control of her movements, she's likely to get some orgasmic satisfaction. She can either press her clitoris against the shaft of your penis, rub it against your body, or lean back or forwards so that her G spot gets the pressure it needs to give her pleasure. If you can last long enough, this is the position that gives her the greatest chance of reaching orgasm during intercourse.
If she wants to increase the sensation in her vagina, she can use her PC muscles to squeeze your penis: that will increase your pleasure, and it will certainly increase the pressure on her G spot - and most likely increase the chances of her ejaculating when she reaches orgasm. (That's the subject of another article - but basically, if her G spot is stimulated for long enough, and she's in the right frame of mind, then when she reaches orgasm, the fluid that collects in glands around her urethra will squirt out during her orgasmic contractions.)
And one other advantage of woman on top is that you can see her breasts, and caress them as she moves on top of you. Of course, if she's facing away from you, then you have the pleasure of watching her buttocks as she moves. But a lot of men find this position uncomfortable, as it bends the penis too much.
And what next? Well, the good ol' missionary. But before you groan, think again. Many women love missionary position sex, because it allows for those deep moments of intimacy and connection that women adore. And men like them too - though maybe not as much or as often as women! But sex in the man on top position, with her legs bent upwards, her knees nearer her chest, allows for deep penetration and lots of loving feeling. And if you have a penis that curves upwards when it's erect, as many do, then the man on top variations will allow your penis to stimulate her G spot as you make love. Combine this with a little clitoral play (perhaps by placing a vibrator between you both as you make love) and you have the best of all possible worlds for her!
As a refinement, you can stop thrusting and move your hips in a circular pattern - that's called Churning The Butter in Tantric sex circles, and it can send her into orbit. Another variation: try eight shallow thrusts followed by one deep one. The shallow thrust should just press on her G spot, so don't go more than a couple of inches into her when you try this routine.
Another great idea for her to reach orgasm is to have her sitting on a table with her legs apart - or any other surface where she's the right height for you to enter her while you're standing in front of her - and to thrust into her as you kiss and hold each other. If you want to increase the chances of her reaching orgasm, you can give her a little extra clitoral stimulation, and your regular thrusting may catch her G spot in just the right way to bring her to a rapid climax. It's also a lot more exciting to be having sex both in an unusual position and out of the bedroom, and the extra excitement of this can help take you both to a quicker orgasm.
Next, there's a very loving position known as the spoons position. She lies on her side with her back towards you, while you enter her from behind. This is a very easy position to get into, especially if she lifts her upper leg slightly while you push into her, and it feels great for both of you. You can reach around her, caress her breasts and kiss her neck and back, while she (or you) can play with her clitoris. Another great variation of this position is to make love on your sides while you face each other: it's easiest to get into this position by starting from the man on top, where she raises her legs and you then roll over onto your sides. You can keep going for much longer in this position, as there's much less pressure on your penis: with the right amount of loving attention and perhaps a helping hand on her clitoris, she will reach orgasm before you do, and you can even enjoy the pleasure of simultaneous orgasm.
And lastly, what about the thrill of rear entry (aka doggy style)? It's many men's favorite position, raw, rude and raunchy, and usually makes men come quite quickly. But the surprising thing is that lots of women like it too, and there are plenty of good reasons for this. It allows deep penetration, it allows her to express her sexuality to the full (she can thrust, move and ride her man as she wishes) and, above all, it hits the spot - the G spot, that is! It's a very primal position, especially if you reach forward and hold her hips and guide her movements. If she raises her hips or lowers them, you'll get a lot of variation in sensation - so you can find the position that gives you both the greatest pleasure.
There you are, then: a series of positions to try for the thrill of orgasm during intercourse. But if these positions don't do it for you, don't worry - just ensure she has her orgasm (with oral sex or a hand job) before you enter her, and you'll both still be satisfied. While being able to reach orgasm during intercourse feels great, there are plenty of other ways of getting sexual satisfaction!
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