Avoid Traffic School - Choose Behind the Wheel Amusement Carefully

When the traffic is bumper-to-bumper and the plastic bag blowing on the freeway shoulder is moving faster than your car, what is a driver to do to amuse oneself?

I asked a few drivers what they do in rush hour traffic to keep themselves sane without breaking the law and having to end up participating in traffic school.

Some ideas were good, some were bad and some were just plain ugly.

The Good: These folks amused themselves with harmless mind fodder that would in no way send them on the path to traffic school.

Diane F. of Covina reads license plate frames and tries to figure out what the abbreviations on personalized vanity plates mean. VRECUL, Diane.

Of course, there are the singers - Kevin H. of Aliso Viejo belts out Switchfoot tunes; and the thinkers - Andy N., a hockey coach from San Jacinto keeps his mind occupied in rush hour traffic by thinking about - what else? Hockey.

Mona G. of Hemet talks to herself. When asked if she also answers herself she replied, "Of course!"

I wasn't sure whether to laugh or be very concerned for her children.

Talk radio keeps John W. of Riverside alert and Comedy Central and ESPN on XM radio provide mental stimulation for Jon R. of Corona.

And then there is Tate C. of Banning who says that he does nothing to keep himself amused during rush hour traffic since he enjoys driving in rush hour traffic.

Tate C. is either really well adjusted or very confused.

The jury is still out.

The Bad: While nothing these folks choose to do for entertainment behind the wheel will get them the traffic ticket / traffic school consequence, their answers could still be perceived as dancing delicately on the border between right and wrong.

Since the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration says the risk of being involved in a collision is four times higher when using a cellular telephone, we are going to put this activity under the "bad things to do while driving" category.

If this is the case, then Cristina C. of Chino is bad.

Really, really bad.

"Rush hour traffic makes me nuts, so I always have to talk on my phone the entire time I’m driving to relax,"  Cristina says.

In California, this is now illegal unless she uses a hands - free device. While a citation for this offense will not land her in traffic school, she can get a pain-in-the wallet fine.

If Cristina looked in her rearview mirror, she may have noticed Bob K. of Norco watching her. His rush hour amusement comes in the form of snickering at people talking on their cell phones as they drive.

Please note that when I asked him if he ever talks on a cell phone while driving, he looked down at the ground coyly and smiled as he said, "Of course not."

As everyone else sits in the parking lot of freeway gridlock, Dave E. of Aliso Viejo enjoys waving to people from his motorcycle as he whizzes by in between the lanes.

OK, he's not doing anything illegal, so he is not actually 'bad'; but waving at people standing dead-still mired in gridlock?

He's just evil.

And the Ugly: I must admit, even the 'ugly' answers would not land the people who gave them in traffic school. Their answers simply caused me to shake my head and raise my eyebrows. 

Ray L. of Sun City unabashedly and with all sincerity admitted that to calm his nerves during rush hour traffic he cleans his nose with his index finger.

I think I've been next to Ray at a stoplight or two.

Then there are "the swearers". Judgmental folks that spend their freeway time venting their irritation in colorful colloquialisms.

Extra credit points go to Dean D. of Redlands, however, who admits that he uses a foreign language to express his frustrations. Somehow swearing at other drivers in Croatian doesn't seem quite as wrong.

I saved my favorite answer for last; though it deserves its own category as it's not good, bad or ugly, and it sure as heck won't land you in traffic school, it's just, for the lack of a better adjective - schmoozy.

Rick K. of Alta Loma's answer for what he does to keep himself amused during rush hour traffic was, "I think about how sweet and lovely my wife is".

Good answer, Rick.

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