Are You Connected or Becoming Disconnected - by Didier Grossemy

Didier Grossemy theory is that the more connected we are, the more we become disconnected

We are living in an unprecedented social experiment.

Never so much technology has been available to everyone.
From a very young age, children start with a computer connected to the Internet then graduate very quickly in the name of parent security with mobile phones, they are the new generation of connected kids.
For these kids social interactivity is happening through emails, SMS and of course what it is called “Social” sites with the likes of Facebook and others.

Adults are very much the same, if you are working in an office, how many times do your co-workers send you an email? Rather than just talking to you... Even if they are just a few meters away…
People just don’t communicate any longer by delivering through their voice and posture a unique charisma and message. Today they will simply SMS or email each other. Individuality almost does not exist as more and more people evolve amongst groups within the so called “Social Networking Sites” and try to outdo each other.

Remember the blink in the eyes and the nice smiles… all gone…

Our interpretation of laughing is now put in three letters “LOL” at the beginning I could not understand people telling me always “lol” I thought I was a kind of a… you know… lol…Lolita… etc… anyway one day I finally graduated and find out that “lol” meant “Lots of Laugh” so you make someone laugh they will reply “lol”.

This is what the world is all about now? Having a good laugh with someone, a tap on the shoulder, a cry, a kiss, a strong emotion is now tree letters. Great! or actually very sad…
If you want to find friendship or life companion, don’t bother talking to your friends or going to a party simply hit a dating site. People will say, it’s SAFE…that’s on itself relatively scary… what’s safe about talking to someone that you don’t know and could be pretending to be anyone. What about falling in love with that person and discover later that the athletic description and impersonation is in fact right the opposite.
Strange world… people are feeling more comfortable in using technology to connect with someone else rather than being in front of another human being.

Are we are becoming a slave of technology rather than using it for what it was designed for…productivity.

What are the consequences of this social behaviour?

Are we connected or socially disconnected…

I personally believe that technology has reduced our social capital—the relationships that bind people together and create a sense of community. Consequences include decreased civility, loss of behavioural boundaries and increased crime. We must find ways to deal with our profound loss of social connectedness.

Even though technological advances have contributed significantly to the problem of isolation, the emphasis on individualism in today’s society has compounded it.

Pappano believes that often we may want to connect with others and to have deep and meaningful relationships, but we want it on our own terms. “We have moved from a society in which the group was more important than the individual,” she says, “to one in which the central figure is the self. ... From the ashes of duty we have risen to claim not merely a healthy dose of freedom but individual supremacy. ... We want success, power, and recognition. We want to be able to buy or command caring, respect, and attention. And today so many of us feel deserving of the service and luxuries once accorded a privileged few. We may live in a more egalitarian society, but we have become puffed full of our own self-worth.”

She believes that the concept of self-sacrifice is no longer a significant part of our modern cultural makeup and is often seen as weakness, not strength. More and more people are evaluating their relationships in terms of cost-benefit analysis and weighing friendship in light of investment and return. Today, instead of considering others, people are more likely to put their own needs first and ask, “What’s in it for me?”

As a result, many are experiencing a new loneliness that stems from being overcommitted and under connected. And increasingly we are being led into a social isolation that we barely notice. As Miller says, “little by little, isolation becomes familiar, even normal. Sadly, even loneliness becomes like the wallpaper in your room; you don’t even really notice it’s there.”
Is it because we want more? Of course it is…

Journalist Laura Pappano (The Connection Gap) examines the impact of the market-driven frenzy to have increasingly more. As we cut ourselves off from one another, we are surrounding ourselves with the newest and latest gadgets and material comforts. Not only do we want these things, however; we want them now. Like Gleick, Pappano believes that “speed has become the Holy Grail.

We want faster service, faster computers, faster fast food, and faster athletes. The pace is so frenetic that speed that is merely linear is no longer speedy. Speed must now have bulk. It is not enough for one thing to be done fast; many things must be done fast at the same time or in such tight sequence that one nearly cuts short the next.”

Multitasking, a term coined by computer scientists in the 1960s to express the ability of a computer to perform multiple operations simultaneously, is now applied to the human machine. Because it is possible to do several things at a time, we try to cram in as much as possible.
As Gleick writes, “These days it is possible to drive, eat, listen to a book, and talk on the phone, all at once, if you dare. No segment of time—not a day, not a second—can really be a zero-sum game.”

To be or not to be… technology free

Some tech-free celebs are recovering tech addicts. Tyra Banks told New York Times Magazine that her BlackBerry habit caused her physical pain. She has since gone low-tech and jots her thoughts in a notebook.

Technophobia, of course, extends far beyond cell phones.

Christopher Walken and David Sedaris don't use cell phones or e-mail. Simon Cowell says he doesn't know how to work a computer. President Bush was lampooned in 2006 for saying he uses "the Google" to look at maps of his Texas ranch. He reportedly doesn't use e-mail for fear that his messages might be subpoenaed. Recently, however, his 84-year-old father, George H.W. Bush Sr., said that he enjoys emailing.

Paul McCartney has admitted he doesn't know how to use ATMs and prefers writing letters over e-mail for "aesthetic" reasons. Elton John is nostalgic for the low-tech vibe of the 1970s. The singer frequently talks about the Internet's stifling effect on community and creativity and even suggested to U.K. paper The Sun that the Internet be shut down for five years to spark better quality art and music.

Technophobia isn't simply generational.

Some young celebrities strive to be tech free, too. Thirty-one-year-old Orlando Bloom has revealed that he doesn't email or own a computer, because he "just [doesn't] want to deal with it."

So here we are… it’s like every good thing in life, you must know how and when to use it but not abusing it. Technology and social tools of all sorts should be used to facilitate relationships but not be the only way of life or business communication. If you only rely on one aspect of communication, personal life or business will simply be disconnected from the real world and from the ultimate end results.

Common! Pick up the phone, don’t be scared…talk or meet someone, it’s good for you.

Article written by: Didier Grossemy

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