The Uninvited Church Parishioners in Guanajuato, Mexico

Arriving at Guanajuato's Templo de la Compañía is always a strange experience. It's a church connected to the former Jesuit seminary, which is now the University of Guanajuato. It sits on one corner of an intersection diagonally across from the main Post Office and faces the Casa del Agua hotel.

I stopped in front of the church's main entrance and made note of the serape-covered very dark-skinned indigenous woman who has been sitting there for as long as I've been living in Guanajuato. She is dressed exactly the same, is covered with the same blanket, and is in the exact same squatting pose with always the same gnarled hand cupped for a handout. I've wondered throughout the years whether she's actually a ceramic sculpture with a coin slot in her raised hand as a moneymaker for the church. This time I checked - no slot. I find this strange beyond words but then strangeness is what describes so much of the Mexican experience.

I walked into the church in a heightened state of curiosity. The last time I was in this church, spring of 2006, I was reviewing it for a book project. At that time, the small gallery behind the main altar was being remodeled and was not open to the public. Now, in October of 2008, the gallery was open again and I was eager to take a look.

An issue I reported on in 2006 in my book was the surprising and shocking discovery that pigeons, and not just a few, lived in the church. On this current visit, I wanted to see if the pigeons were still in residence in this historically significant Colonial Mexican church.

In 1737, the "Religious Process," no doubt a mystical procedure, was completed to establish the congregation. The construction of the church began in 1747 due to the generous donations of the mind-bogglingly rich Señora Maria Josefa Teresa de Busto y Moya and her son, José Joaquin de Sardaneta y Legaspi. There is a portrait of the son in the church's gallery. He bears an uncanny and frightening resemblance to Truman Capote.

The church's construction was initiated under the supervision of architect Fray (friar) José de la Cruz. Later, the construction was put into the hands of the renowned architect Felipe de Ureña.

I have to say that I love this church. The sheer spaciousness of the main sanctuary is most appealing. The church is 53.5 meters long by 28.5 meters wide. Some regard the church as one of the best representations of the "evolution" of the Churrigueresque style in Mexico.

The façade of the church has been undergoing restoration for the last few years. The work, as is typical in Mexico, goes on and on and on with no end in sight.

The church's interior has three huge naves and eight columns. Four of the columns are made of very fine green quarry stone. Each nave has small, colored windows. Unfortunately, some of the panes are broken and the church has not had the money to replace them. As you probably have guessed, it is through these broken panes that the pigeons come and go.

I can recall with frightening clarity my first visit to this church. I saw many fine paintings and religious icons, some of which are museum-quality. Many were splotched with pigeon ca-ca. I remember hearing the peeping of baby pigeons from their nests perched high in the rafters. The parents were coming and going through wind-blown holes in the nave's multicolored windows.

Well, in 2008, the pigeon problem has not improved. There are still lots of pigeons swooping over the parishioners' heads and perching on the ledges high above.

The common pigeons you see in parks all over the world are actually called Rock Doves. They are amazingly adaptive birds that can live almost anywhere and it is these that have infested the church. They love to perch as high as they can on rocks, on building ledges, in trees, and on fountains. If they see a hole in a wall, a broken church window, or an open door, they are likely to go in.

The Rock Dove, or pigeon (the words are synonymous), is not indigenous to North America, Central America, or South America. Many people are surprised to learn that the multicolored, clown-like, park-infesting pigeon is from western and southern Europe. They can range into Africa and southern Asia.

These clever little birds show their intelligence by the extent to which they can survive. And, surviving they were. While I sat in the church and contemplated the architecture, I saw a pair of pigeons having sex on top of Jesus' head on the main altar's crucifix. Afterwards, they made pigeon poo-poo all over the crucifix.

By the way, in case you are wondering how the Rock Dove got to the New World, it was the fault of the French. In 1609, the French thought it would be cool to create a plague of pigeons that would infest every city in the New World. They not only infest the parks, they have taken up residence in a few hundred Spanish colonial churches all over Mexico. Now, I don't know if that was their actual motive, but it is what has happened. All the pigeons, or Rock Doves, you see in a park (or church) near you come from the original stock the French imported into Nova Scotia in 1609.

I was curious about what the parishioners thought about the pigeon problem and how they protected themselves from being bombed by pigeon poop during Mass. Do they use umbrellas? Does the priest look out on a sea of rain slicker-clad church parishioners? Do they put a tarp above the pews? I just had to find out, so I went around and asked everyone I saw.

The first person I talked to was a very nice woman whose job it was to clean the pigeon doodies from the church. Taking the opportunity to rest a bit from her toil, she gave me the immediate impression that she was immensely satisfied that someone recognized the impossible task of keeping on top of the pigeon mess. She wasn't sure why no one had come up with the idea of replacing the broken windowpanes or at least covering the openings with wire mesh to keep the pigeons out. She said (and this was confirmed by the second person I interviewed) that the pigeons create a huge problem during Mass and other services, especially weddings. I cannot begin to imagine what it must be like to attend a church service, wearing your best Sunday suit or new Easter bonnet, while hoards of pigeons fly overhead and rain poop down.

The first time I visited this church, workers were removing the golden crowns off of a statue of Mary holding the Baby Jesus. Apparently, a family of pigeons had taken up residence inside the crowns. The damage defied description. On this visit, I was happy to see that the crowns had been cleaned and replaced and the statue was again in pristine condition.

The corrosiveness of pigeon excrement is unquestionable as is the public heath issue. In addition to causing serious damage to buildings, they are associated with human illnesses such as Psittacosis-a potentially fatal flu-like disease; Meningitis-though unlikely, it is found in the nests; Salmonella-sometimes fatal; Mites and Fleas; Rats-attracted to the nest to prey on the baby pigeons; Aggravated breathing problems including asthma.

The second goal I had for this visit was a more delightful discovery. The former sacristy, located behind the main altar, had been remodeled and was again open to the public. The door leading to the gallery is to the left of the main altar and up a few steps. Though not terribly impressive, I'm happy to report the total absence of pigeons in this area. I don't know how they keep the pigeons from entering the gallery from the main sanctuary. There is a person posted at the door to take the $10 peso entrance fee. Perhaps part of the job is to do pigeon guard duty. There are a few windows in the gallery, but all are intact and all are covered with tight netting.

Though the artists of many of the paintings in the gallery are unknown, there are some paintings by Juan Patricio Morlete, Baltazar Echave Oreo, and Miguel Cabrera. The artists won't have to worry from the grave that their neoclassical, tequitqui, and vice-royal period paintings in the new gallery have become pigeon toilets.

I asked both employees in the church what they thought should be done about the pigeon problem.

"Saque las palomas." - "Remove the pigeons."

"¿Pero como?" - "But how?" I asked.

They shrugged their shoulders, in typical Mexican fashion, and asked,

"¿Quién sabe?" - "Who knows?"