Common Mistakes While Parenting Children

You have made it through 40 weeks of anxiety studded waiting. Your baby has finally arrived and you are itching to try out your newly acquired parenting skills. But before you tumble into the glory and pain of parenting, it would help if you knew more about some of the most common mistakes parents make while bringing up young children.

When you look into the innocent little faces looking up at you with nothing but wonder in their eyes, it is easy to believe that your toddler is all innocence. This is the first mistake new parents make. Young infants are quite perceptive when it comes to people and surroundings. That is why your child is able to recognize its mother even before they open their eyes. From the time your child is born, they are watching the world with avid eyes and internalizing everything they see. So, as parents everything that you say and do is picked up by your child. Your child is watching, you had better pull your socks up!

According to a recent internet survey, most young parents are becoming more and more dependent on ‘Howto’ books and expert columns to look after their kids. While some amount of expert counseling from experienced doctors and child experts can help you understand your child and your problems, depending too much on third-party advice can be counter-productive. As a parent, nature has endowed you with an important monitoring system that helps you take the right decisions for your children: this is your inner radar or instinct, as we call it. It is important to tune in to your instinct and take independent decisions based on your observation, the individuality of your child and the circumstances. No guide or expert column can give you a customized solution for your problems. You learn as you go.

Proactive parenting is another skill that most parents need to learn as their child grows. Parents often complain that their young children refuse to do as they are told. This kind of behavior can begin right from the time your child is a toddler and continue into his late teens. Therefore, it pays to equip yourself with the know-how to avoid this confrontational attitude. The secret is to guide your child to acceptable behavior through positive persuasion, instead of forcing them towards it through the fear of punishment. For example, if your child throws a tantrum when you go shopping, it would be advisable to speak to your child before you leave home and explain to him that he will not get anything if he makes a scene but that you will buy him a candy if he allows you to shop peacefully. Reward, not punishment, should be the motivating force.

It is said that the few people who know perfect parenting are those with no children of their own. Parenting is a continuous learning process. And it is quite natural for parents to make mistakes. After all, we are all human. But it is important to understand your mistakes and rectify them in time so that you can have a rich and rewarding relationship with your child.